𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 | 𝐉𝐉 [edited]

014

Rafe liked to talk when he was high. Riley barely listened, just zoned out and stared at the water and hummed in response when things would get silent, signifying to her that he had finished another story or rant or whatever the hell he was going on about.

Riley didn't have too much experience with the drug, taking it maybe a few times before with Topper or Kelce, or maybe once with Rafe but she couldn't remember.

She hated herself for sitting there, getting high with the guy who had yelled at her, grabbed her wrist, and caused JJ to step in and help her escape just the other day... but she hated her sober thoughts more at that moment. She needed a distraction, that was the only reason she was there with him.

"Rafe," she said finally, breaking her silence. "What do you want to do with your life?"

He looked up at her, first with his brows furrowed and then he eased his face into what appeared to show her he was amused. He let out a chuckle and shook his head. "What?"

"You're 19," she said, pointedly.

"Right, you like to remind me of that," he replied.

She looked at him as he shook his head once again before taking another drag from the blunt between his fingers. She could tell he wasn't planning on answering the question but she was too curious at this point to let it go.

This is what she decided she needed to know: if anyone in this god-forsaken town had any kind of dreams or aspirations that could inspire her. That was it, she sought to feel inspired, not understood. It was the dilemma that had been plaguing her mind and now that she was high, which she hated to admit actually helped her come to this realization, she figured she needed to find someone that would inspire her.

"Seriously," she said. "I'm interested to hear."

"Right," he said, laughing again to dismiss the seriousness in her voice. He sighed when he looked up at her to see her staring right back at him, her head tilted and a curious look playing on her features. He knew she wasn't going to give it up. "I'll work for my Dad, take over the company once he's done with it."

"You say that as if it's already set in stone," Riley mused.

"Yeah, it is," he scoffed. "Why are you asking me this? What's your sudden interest in my aspirations for life or whatever?"

"Well that's exactly what I'm wondering," she said. "Do you have aspirations for your life?" She didn't even know what she was saying at this point, the words were leaving her mouth before she had time to think them over. She knew she was too high for her own good.

"I just told you," he said curtly.

"You're telling me you don't dream about anything outside of a life working for your Dad? You just want to grow up to become your Dad? Live the same life you've always lived?"

"Are you implying there's something wrong with that?" Rafe scoffed.

Riley stayed silent, letting her mind wander as she contemplated his question. Of course there was something wrong that, she wanted to say. She couldn't wait to get out of the hell hole that was this small town with all its petty rivalries, and expectations, and... and nothingness.

If she was sure about one thing in life it was that there was nothing this town could offer her that would make her want to stay here past high school. She wanted to go to college far away from her sister who hated her, her parents who would never be pleased with her, and everyone else that would never understand her... that would never make her feel inspired to live.

"Alright, Riles," Rafe finally said after minutes of silence had passed, reminding her that she was still here, still with him, still very much high. "What do you want to do with your life?" He asked the question softly, but with a smirk spread across his lips, clearly mocking her.

She looked out to the water and hummed. "I don't know."

"Right," Rafe said letting out a laugh. She knew what he was thinking at that moment, that he was so much better than her for having a plan for his life, for being so sure about what he wanted the rest of his years on this earth to look like.

Maybe he was right, she thought. What made her think she was so high and mighty for wanting to just simply get out of this town? She didn't have any plans outside of wanting to escape. She didn't actually know what she wanted to do or what she wanted to become. All she wanted to do was flee. And maybe, she thought, maybe that made her a coward.