Never The Same

Chapter Six

"She's your daughter too," my mom yells from the kitchen. I just walked through the door.

"I just don't see why boarding school is a bad idea," my step-father says.

"She only has one year left, Tom. There's no point."

"Well, if she finishes her high school off at Chester's Academy, she can go to college for free. I think that's our best choice."

"Is this because you want another kid? I'm not having another child. It's too much."

"I'm up for adoption. Maybe then you'll realize what being a mother feels like again."

"I'm already a mother, and you are a father now too. I'm sorry you missed your chance. Maybe we shouldn't have got married. Are you regretting that now?"

My parents fight often, it wasn't anything abnormal. I think they try to hide it when I come home from school, but it isn't something to be easily stopped one moment and continued the next. I usually don't even tell them I'm home, until about an hour later when my mom realizes how late it is. It became part of the daily routine, I noticed, because my mom comes up and brings me cookies and apologizes for everything.

I personally think that my mom misses my dad. She never talks about him anymore, but I can just tell by the way she looks at some things, like her wedding ring. She sits on the couch alone and just stares at the ring Tom gave her. There's no smile on her face. Sometimes, for just a split second, I even see tears forming in her eyes. But then she wiped them away and stops thinking about everything.

"Of course not," Tom says sympathetically. "I just don't know what to do once Ellie's gone."

"I'm sorry," my mom replies. "Maybe we should finish this conversation later, over dinner?"

"That sounds great."

And that was that. Tom makes up this lame excuse and my mom forgives. Sometimes I think my mom forgives too easily. She has a hard life, and Tom isn't making it any better. It's like feels powerless and there's no way to get out of this relationship. Tom controls her and if he wants another kid, that's what he's going to get. I feel bad for my mom, but I don't want to confront her about it, because it might make her sad. And I don't want to do that.

I looked around and saw pictures. Some of me, my mother, and a few of my step-father. Even a couple of us together. But there were no pictures of Emma. It's like they've forgotten who she is. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one who remembers anything. It's like she never existed, and we all know that's not true.

My mom divorced my dad a year before the kidnapping incident. She said that he was never around, and that's why. My father is in the army and visits every once in a while. My mom confronted him about quitting, but he refused to. She always would ask him why he wanted a family if he would never see them. To which he responded that he wanted a reason to live if he was ever in the situation of dying. And I guess that makes sense, because it's much easier to let go than to hold on.

But my mom, she seemed all happy a few months before the divorce. She was always going out for a "business" meeting or dinner. But the truth was, she was seeing someone. I didn't know how to feel about that. I loved my mom, but she was cheating on my dad, and that wasn't right. I wanted to tell my dad what was going on, but I was too scared. I don't really know why though.

I haven't seen my dad in forever. It was way before the divorce. I have one picture of him from the last time that Emma and I saw him. My mom doesn't know I have it. I keep it in the locked drawer of my nightstand, along with other sentimental items. Things like heart lockets that contained a baby picture of Emma and I. Our dad gave them to us when we were five. We've always worn them, until the incident. They both had the letter "E" engraved on them.

I ran upstairs without saying anything to my mom. I grabbed the home phone on the way upstairs and called a taxi company. While packing my bag, I noticed that my bed wasn't made, but I didn't care enough to think about it. I unlocked the drawer with the key from underneath my pillow. I took Emma's necklace and put it around my neck. Then I made sure I had money and the picture of my dad, Emma, and I.

The taxi driver beeped the horn once and I ran downstairs, through the door. I set my bag down to put some money in my pocket, but the driver kept rushing me. I walked down the stairs and into the car.

"Drive," I said.

"Where to," He asked.

"Turn left on Dawson, and keep going straight until I tell you to stop."

I turned back to look at my house and wondered if my mom would be curious to look outside. She peeked her head out the door and looked both left and right, down the road. Then, I realized I left my bag on the porch as she picked it up. She didn't look inside, instead she just put it in the toy box.

"Goodbye," I whispered. "I'll see you soon."

We drove down Dawson Avenue until we hit Marketer Road, then the taxi man turned right and kept going straight. He put on some really terrible music and turned up the volume. It didn't bother me, I wasn't going anywhere specific.

I laid back in my seat and watched out the window. I saw grass meadows and deer. I smiled at them and waved. Then, I looked out the front window to see a car swerving into the opposite lane. It was one of those moments that lasted forever and I could see it coming.

We were going to crash.

I felt every minute of it. I gripped on to the door, and the taxi man jerked his steering wheel to avoid the car. Then I felt the tiny bit of impact becoming stronger as the cars collided. My body tensed and I hit my head against the window that shattered. And everything stopped. And I felt okay. I unbuckled my seat belt and climbed out of the car.

I first checked the taxi man's pulse. He didn't have one. His face was all red with blood, and I could see bruises forming. I started to cry. I gabbed the phone from his pocket.

"Hello, this is 9-1-1," the lady said. "What is your emergency?"

"I'm on Marketer Road. There was a car crash. I need an ambulance now."

"Are you hurt ma'am?"

"Yes, please hurry."

I hung up the phone and walked over to the other vehicle. The guy was breathing. I sighed from relief, but I couldn't stop crying. I turned around to walk to the nearest gas station, but I saw a man behind me.

"Oh, thank goodness. Someone is here. Please help, I was just in a car crash. These people are hurt, please help them."

The person didn't say anything, they just took out something from their pocket and sprayed it in my direction. When I inhaled it, I immediately felt drowsy and passed out.