i thought you knew

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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ೃ༄


    when the door opened, you froze. you were not expecting to see him on the other side. you didn't want to see him on the other side. yet, here he was, right in front of you, face to face with you. you both stared at each other, doe-eyed. it's like neither of you knew how to speak anymore.

    you cleared your throat, awkwardly shifting the weight you carried between your two feet. "is nick not home?"

    matt shook his head. "he's out right now."

    "oh. cool," you bit your lip, "i guess i'll just go then."

    you and matt had a rocky past. it wasn't something you necessarily liked talking about, but you often found yourself talking about him anyways. in the beginning, you and matt were inseparable. you showed him the purest love he'd ever experienced, and he showed you the sun, moon and the stars. he gave you the entire galaxy. it was everything you had dreamed for, and it was perfect. but things changed slowly, like how the weather shifts. he seemed different- he was acting distant and not putting in the same amount of effort he once had. and then, out of the blue, on september 7th, matt said it was over.

    you felt like matt had stopped loving you. like his love had vanished in thin air. what else were you supposed to think? he dropped you like it meant nothing to him. but you didn't know that his heart still beat for you, even louder than before. matt didn't break up with you because he stopped caring, but because he was scared. his love for you was so immensely large, but he felt like he wasn't good enough for you. he compared himself to all of the boys you've loved before. he didn't break up with you because he didn't love you. he broke up with you because he loved you so much, but he knew deep down that you deserved better. you never knew this reason though. you didn't know that he was still in love with you. nobody knew that. not even his own brothers. and because you were still friends with nick, that often meant running into matt every once in a while. you avoided it as much as you could, and so did nick, but at the end of the day it was inevitable. you could only beat around the bush for so long. whenever you did run into him, it was awkward as hell. he barely looked at you, barely even acknowledged your presence, and when he did, it was a small glance that said nothing- but it always said everything at the same time.

    matt hesitated as he watched you walk away. he felt like he should say something, but he wasn't sure what he'd say. he had so many things to say, but he didn't know how you'd receive them. he caught your attention. "or... um- or you could stay."

    you furrowed your brows. "...stay with you?"

    "you could just wait for nick inside. he'll be home soon." he said, and his hands were shaking.

    you hesitated, weighing your options. you could either go home and just call nick when he's available. avoid any weird situations and any weird conversations. or you could go inside with matt, make awkward small talk with your ex (who you weren't the happiest with anyways), while waiting for god knows how long for nick to come home. the first option was sounding a lot more ideal. you stuttered. "oh- um,"

    "well, you don't have to. just a thought." matt rolled his eyes. "it's not that deep. i'm not asking to get back together, you could just wait in nick's room for him."

    you stared at him, stiff. your shoulders were so tense you could practically feel them against your ears. you spoke eventually. "okay,"

    you followed matt inside silently. it was already awkward, and you were regretting saying okay to this- that you were chill with this, that you were perfectly and completely fine right now. cause you weren't. you weren't fine with this, you weren't okay right now. so many questions and things left unsaid swarmed your mind right now, and you had no idea how to react and you had no idea what to make of this situation right now. you suddenly felt extremely overwhelmed, and emotions that you had been suppressing for so long were beginning to come up (more than you liked to admit). and before you could stop yourself, you felt a question coming up like word vomit, and it was too late to take anything back.

(mine all mine) 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬Where stories live. Discover now