Strain

Chapter 12

Chapter 12

The feeling of drowning has become a part of me. It seals me up like the glass case in Snow White. I can see through it but I can never get out. I want to get out, to stop this helplesness. But I cant. Their faces are always inprtinted in my head. Every where I look. In the darkness and light they are right there. Starting at me with hopeless expressions. I could have saved them but I chose the wrong choice. I was selfish for my own life and stubborn. All this my fault. My brothers have turned into two pieces of stone. Always cold and hard to break. That's why the two people I love the most are dead. It's all my fault for being a damn angel.
Angels are suppose to help people. Aid them in hard times and lead them to the best path. I don't feel like I'm doing anything good in this world.
And here I stand where everything started. The rain pours down in buckets, scortching my skin. It blinds me as I walk through it. The air smacks my hair around my face. All I have on is a thin gown and am bare foot. But I could care less what I'm wearing. What I'm endearing is nothing to what they have suffered. I stand outside the house that is now permenantly abonded forever until a new buyer comes and gets it. The once cheery lighted house is now a ghost of the house before. I glance one last time at the house and sprint through the field and into the woods. I passed through the trees like blur. Tree branches smack my face and scraped my bare flesh. No pain could over come what is now in my heart.
I can see the clearing up ahead before it stops and turns into a giant gap. Where the ocean once swallowed the ground and made it part of him. I stop at the edge of the cliff. It's hard to tell where the surface is in this storm but I think it wouldn't matter once I jump off of here.
I grasp at the necklace around my neck. The last thing my mother gave me. The last thing my birth mother touched. Now I think of her as a curse for brining me here. For giving life to me, my family is dead. I don't know how much hate I could have towards two people I have never met. But here I am sulking in my hate and sorrow. About to attempt the stupidest stunt that has come to existence. There is no going back. It's time to end everyone's suffering.
I step right at the edge. I close my eyes but I don't move. Every bone in my body stops moving. I try to budge but nothing happens. I open my eyes and I'm still standing at the edge. Why can't I move? I scan the area for anyone but no one is there. I look at the sky and there is just one blue patch out of all the gray ones. When I see it my senses kick in.
What the hell am I doing? My parents would never accept this! What kind of sane person does this?
I start backing away and walk into the woods. I can't move as fast anymore when I first came. I have no motivation. I have nothing to live for yet I am still alive.
Something feels warm on my chest. I look down and my necklace let's out a warm glow. It feel like it is beating with energy. I reach and touch it. Rub it between my fingers. The more I touch it, the more it glows.
"Mommy?" I whisper out softly. It comes out as a whimper. And just as the words fly out of my mouth it glows brighter. I know what I'm going to do now. I'm going to avenge you mom and dad. And I'm going to make them pay for what they have done. If it's the last thing I do.
"Max I need you." I say out load. And just like fog he appears before me like a god. This time I see everything he has to offer to me. His wings span is about 12 feet. The color of his wings are so dark it isn't black anymore. Some parts are purple others are blue. Every feather is like a black pearl. They glisten even though there is no sun. His shirt is ripped off and some pieces of cloth are still attached to him. Every muscle on his chest flexes with every breath he takes. His hair is dripping wet from the rain. His eyes looked surprised and something else. I let out a gasp at his glory. I have never looked at him this way.
He opens his arms to me and I run into them. I let him embrace me and move his body heat into me. I don't move away from him and he doesn't pull away. For the last time I cry for them. I took comfort in the one person that could help me.
***
Max carried me back to the house. I called in the maids and told them to fix the house how it was. I decided I wasn't going to run anymore. Instead of being the hunted I'm going to to become the hunter. Max went out for my brothers so I can deliver the news.
I want to talk to them about so many things I have decided for the past hours. It's like the blind fold I wore was magically ripped off. I wait anxiously for them. Still in the same dripping wet clothes next to the hearth. I'm standing in the library, surrounded by books.
"I brought you warm clothes. We don't want you catching your death real soon. I think we have had enough deaths for one year." Sally said sternly. I didn't notice her walking into the library.
"Sally do you hate me?" I ask her. I turn towards her and her eyes turn soft.
"Of course not My Little Lamb. Why would I?" She walks over to me and pulls my hair behind my ear. I shrug and take the warm clothes. She starts walking away.
"Sally, I know why. I might get you killed." It comes out of me before I can stop it. She turns to me and looks me in the eyes.
"Non' of tha' is your fault. You speak of this one more time. I'll treat you like a two yer' old." She used the tone of voice that means she means it.
"But.."
"Ther' is no buts in this place. Understood?"
"Yes ma'am. " I wait for her to walk off and I start to change into the dry clothes.
It was one of my favorite dresses my mother bought me. It was white and red and pale pink flowers decorated the rim. A wide silk pale pink ribbon was at the waist and tied to my back in an elegant bow. The top was a T shape, making my shoulders bare. My black curls fell over me like a water fall. I look in the mirror and stare at my reflection. My eyes are a sad blue-violate. I look nothing like my mother and never will.
I always knew I was adopted from the streets but it never hurt. Now there is a stake in my heart digging farther and farther in.
"You look absolutely beautiful." I turn around at the sound of his voice. The gorgeous bastard stands in front of me. He is the reason my parents are dead. Him and his cruel sister.
I will never bring myself to hate them though. Not even for taking away the people I love the most. I can't hate them because I love them too much to.
"What the hell are you doing in my house? You have no permission to be in here you filthy bastard!" I yell at him. Anger is being put in every syllable I say.
"Love don't be angry. It was not me who killed them. It was my dear sister. She has a temper you know." He says casually. His casual tone just makes my blood boil at how much anger I have towards him.
"This is still your fault. You tricked me. You let her kill them! I can't stand seeing your face." I say through my teeth. Tears were burning their way out.
"Yet you didn't kill me the moment you saw me. You still want me by your side. You can't hate me like you wish you could."
"Watch me."
He takes a step towards me and I take a step back. I reach for I
the iron stick and lift it up to defend myself.
"Take one more step and I will shove this through your heart." I spit out.
"Love no need for violence." He gives me a charming smile but I don't fall for it again.
"What do you want?"
"I want to help you out."
"Lier. You always have lied to me. I don't know when you have ever told me the truth. I bet all those times you kissed me you couldn't wait to make it stop. You're name probably is fake."
"I'll tell you two truths love. My name isn't John. It's Aboddon the dark angel of destruction. And during those kisses all I ever wanted to do is want to make you mine." Hearing what his true name shakes my body. Fear seeps into the core of my bones. I kissed Aboddon. Why am I not dead.
"I don't find it hard to believe your Abbodon but I do find it hard to on the last part." I say getting all the courage I can master. My voice shakes a little.
"Believe what you wish love. But your parents' deaths are not in my hands. They are on Azreal's."
"Get out of my house." I growl.
"Right after this."
As swift as Heri.. Err Azreal he was right next to me. He pulls me into his arms and presses a mouthwatering kiss to my lips. His tongue invades my mouth. He cradles my tongue in his. I raise my hands to shove him off but he is no longer there. I slump on the couch behind me and process what just happened. Why does he keep kissing me?
The doors open from the library and Max is standing right in between them. I bask in his glory that he puts upon me. My brothers stride in. Their faces filled with no pain but normalcy. But their eyes betray their true feelings.
I run to them and embrace them in a hug. They hug me back. Even after being the cause of their suffering they still love me.
"I have decided what to do now." I start off. "I don't want you guys with me anymore. This is my fight. You guys will live long happy life's. Get married, have kids, own a home, grow old, and die of old age. I will fight for our parents' death." Xavier opens his mouth but I shush him. "I I'll make them pay for the suffering they caused us. And I will do this alone."
"Do you think your the only one wanting revenge?" Brian asked me. I shake my had unable to answer.
"If you get your revenge we want ours." Xavier said.
"We are family and we fight together or we don't fight at all. Understand Esmeralda?" Brian used a tone of voice I've never heard him use.
"It's all or nothing." Xavier agrees.
"Okay brothers. We are all in this together." I say before we all give each other one big great hug. I kissed them both and we turned to Max.
"So when do we start training." Xavier asks.