Show Me Love Exist

Chapter 24

Jordan's POV

I woke up in James's arm slowly and got out of the bed rushing to leave the hotel room.

He was asleep snoring softly. He looked so peaceful. His arms were all over the place. The sheets lay perfectly over his tone body and I wanted to crawl back into bed with him but I decided against it.

I  picked up my dress and heels from the floor. I opened the door and whispered "I am sorry"  before closing it.

I called an uber since last night I was the one to drive James's car to the hotel.

"Oh my God, you're the Jordan Parker," the uber driver said twice with excitement in his voice.

"Yeah, that's me," I said smiling awkwardly.

" Yes, I know.  I mean I am a huge fan of your work, I saw you on tv last night, you were amazing.  I am working on getting your gadget for my wife and I. That was a pretty good idea you had there, I am sorry that you had to use it at such circumstance ..." once he said that I started to space out. To him it meant nothing so he just kept talking and I partially listened to what he was saying.

I couldn't stop thinking more about the kidnapping and last night so I decided to make a stop.

"Actually can you please bring me to this address and thank you for being such a great fan, here is a discount code you can enter when you do purchase my gadget," I said to the driver interrupting him, it's the least I can do for not listening to him.

He dropped me at my therapist's office but Keller wasn't open yet.

I waited a few minutes in front of the office, pacing until I saw her car coming into the parking lot.

She was walking up toward the building with her head down, typing away on her phone.

"Hey," I said when she reached talking distance.

"Wow, Hey Jordan. What are you doing here? It's pretty early. Did you have another vision? " Keller asked startled, putting her hand over her heart for dramatic effect.

" Actually no, I just feel the need to talk to you," I said to her

"Okay, we can do that," She said and grabbed her keys to open her office door. We went to our usual room and I took my spot on the couch.

"Last night, I had this event thing for my gadget-" I started.

"Oh yes, I saw, Congratulations" Keller complimented me as she sits down on the opposite chair facing me.

"Thank You, James, my partner and I ... tried being alone to "celebrate" "

"Really Jordan? How old are we? You can say the word sex" She said

But the word sex is more blunt and held no feelings toward the action.

But "making love" sound more fitting, that's what I wanted to do with James. I wanted him to know that I appreciated everything he has done & his persistence.

I simply nod. "Okay, what happened ?" Keller asked.

"I thought that I was ready but when he saw my scars... I kind of jumped away from him. I thought he was going to push me away so I pushed myself away first. I couldn't take the rejection"

" It's okay Jordan, it happens. He was the one to rescue you so you felt the need to be vulnerable to him last night. In a sense, you are coping from a sexual trauma Jordan,  it's not going to be easy to just get back to normal, it will take some time.  You will be uncomfortable with your body and someone else seeing you whole. We got to work on accepting what is now. If he is truly the one, he will wait for you until you are ready, but do not feel guilty that you did not have sexual intercourse last night. When the time is right, you will know,  don't rush it" Keller said.