Chapter 16: Divorce Papers

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I woke up with a smile followed quickly by a frown. A smile because Rykan was everything I needed last night. He was angry at first and I could tell it wasn't completely gone but he held me the rest of the night. He didn't ask me his usual questions and he didn't make a move on me. He just held me, stroked my hair, rubbed my back, made me feel cared for. I hadn't been cared for by a man like that ever. Even when things were good with Evan and I, he never once held me like that, in a way that made me feel... I didn't want to think the word because it was crazy but the way Rykan made me feel last night was....loved. It was crazy. He didn't love me already. I didn't love him already. I definitely felt something, though, especially after that.

So I woke with a smile, because it was just what I needed. But I frowned because when I woke up I had Annie's head on my stomach and Les's knee was way too close to my head. We always fell asleep on top of each other during sleepovers. It wasn't that that bothered me. It's that Rykan's arms were gone and I immediately missed them.

I carefully disentangled from my two best friends and went quietly to the kitchen. I wanted to make breakfast for them as a thank you for being there for me and they happened to love my French toast.

Working quietly as possible, I started throwing the ingredients together. My mind was unable to come away from Rykan and each thought of him brought an involuntary smile to my face. I was nearly done when Les padded into the kitchen and looked at me strangely.

"What?" I asked, frowning.

Was it the food? Did it smell off? I smelled the air but it smelled good to me.

"Nothing, I just... I wasn't expecting to see a smile like that on your face. You look super happy," she said, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh," I said. "I'm just... I think I'm just happy to be out of that house finally. And last night was great. Thank you."

"Of course," she shrugged. "Is that your French toast?" She asked, biting her lip, desperately trying to hold back a smile.

"Yes," I said, giggling.

She squealed and jumped up and down, turning and running down the hall.

"Annie, get your ass up!" She yelled.

"Fuck off, I'm still sleeping!" Annie yelled back.

"Kora made French toast!"

"Oh my God," Annie muttered.

I heard scrambling and soon Annie came into the kitchen, inhaling deeply.

"The gods are real and they do love me," she said, setting her hand over her chest dramatically. "They sent me the French toast goddess in the form of you," she said, walking over and kissing my cheek. "Bless you child!"

I couldn't help the laugh but Les just rolled her eyes, walking past Annie and getting plates. We ate breakfast and the two of them bickered over who was having more and who got to keep what leftovers. I stayed silent and enjoyed the show, laughing as they tore a piece in half trying to take it from each other. They were basically adult-sized children. I loved that about them.

Annie had to hurry off to classes but Les didn't have classes until later in the afternoon. While she was in the shower I made a plan with Francesca for Fiona's surgery as well as started looking up recovery from brain surgeries. I liked to be organized so I ended up moving to Les's laptop and printing out all kinds of information about recovery, what it looks like, the pacing, different side-effects and changes, what was normal and what wasn't, proper resting, all of that stuff. I stole one of Les's empty binders and organized it all in there, checking my email for Francesca's response.

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