Halcyon

Part 78

"My body froze at the sight of Kent. His body was limp with a pool of his own blood as a halo.

"No," I rushed past him to see three more bodies, dead, then i saw her. "No.." I dropped to my knees. "No no no no no no no..."

Her hands, so fragile and small, warp around a dagger dug right into her lower chest, and her other at her side. She was trying to stop two bleeding wounds. "Halcyon..." I pressed my hand on top of hers to add more pressure. "I'm right here...my love, I'm right here."

I was late. Too fucking late.

"T..mi.." she struggled to say just my name, she was barely breathing yet she still tried to talk, tried to tell me something.

"No, save your breath," I raise my left hand off her wound to push hair out her face. My right hand never left the dagger wound. "Breathe my love, breathe."

"M..office..aw..ther...two...ter's..."

"No, stop talking. You need to focus on breathing." My face cheeks to burn, my eyes blur but I kept them clear so I could see her. Tears fell onto her face.

"Listen to me..." are the only words I hear clearly. They're the only words she could say clearly. I crouched down to her pink lips. She spoke, and I made the words out. "My office draw, there's two letters."

"Please," I begged her, "don't leave me." Salty tears dripped onto my mouth and I tried to kiss her. "Please," my voice cracked, "please Halcyon. You're all I've got."

She breathed again, weaker with desperation. "Tr...el...see...he..wor..."

"No," I shook my head. "You have to see the world with me. I can't do this alone. Please," I sobbed harder. "PLEASE!" I grabbed her face. "Halcyon I need you."

Two hours earlier I kissed her. She was full of life then, just gave me a massage actually, but in that moment when I tried to kiss her she didn't kiss me back.

She drew a weaker breath, with everything she had she spoke her last words to me, clear as day. "Travel, Tamir, travel and fall in love again."

"No," I pulled away. "Tell me you love me! Don't wish me that! Tell me you love me!" Only then did I start CPR, I pushed and pushed for more air into her lungs. "Tell me you love me!"

"Tamy?!" I heard behind me but I just kept forcing more air into Halcyon's unresponsive lungs. "Oh my god,"

"Tamir," my shoulders are grabbed from behind.

"NO!" I wailed. "Leave me alone!"

"She's gone Tamir,"

"Shut up! No! She's right here!" Her body was still warm at the time, and I wanted to believe, I needed to believe she still had time. I went back to CPR.

"You're making it worse," Sierra's tells me.

"None of you know shit!" I keep pushing. By force I'm dragged off Halcyon's body.

"NO! I can still try!" My lungs burned from trying to breath through tears. "I can still try!"

"Tamir please-"

"HALCYON!" My heart-wrenching scream bounced of the walls. "Not her! NOO!" I coked, "No!" I fight back and freed myself going back to her body. I screamed for her to wake, begged her eyes to open. From the pit of my stomach I screamed."

I sit. Hands still stained with her blood. She's gone.

"Tamir," my eyes open at my name. I stare down into my hands recognizing the voice. "Your sister said-" the voice breaks, "Halcyon..." I watch her feet before her knees drop down right in front of me.

"I'm so sorry," Kate sobs. And my eyes lift to her crying into her hands. "I'm so sorry," my eyes sting and blur simultaneously. I sniff. I hang my head letting my silent tears fall out.

She lost her life time bestfriend and she's here apologizing to me. We both love her.

My eyes stay shut as warm hands take my face. I'm shaking yet she pulls me into her and I grieve harder into her arms. "She loves you." I hold onto her gripping onto anything. "Shut put everything into loving you." She sniffs.

Both my fists are clenched shut. One with the necklace I gave her as a promise to keep the bad men away, another her engagement ring, a promise to marry her.

This hurts. This is nothing compared to the yearning I felt when Kate forced me away form Halcyon, this pain I feel will never leave, because she's never coming back.

She's never coming back. She's never coming back.

I didn't want to sleep, but the crying brought a huge migraine cloud over my head and I knocked out.

I'm too exhausted, I have no will left in my room open my eyes. I play it all back the memories still fresh, her broken words, limp body. Then I remember my own bestfriend, Kent. I lost Kent too.

I'm cursed. I keep losing everything.

"Tamir." I let my eyes open to see Kate sitting in front of me. She's a mess, swollen eyes, dried lips, drained completely. "We've been here three days, no food or water," I blink watching her eyes land on the pool of dried blood, her blood. She goes back to me. I shut my eyes again.

I want to sleep. I want to see her again, in my dreams, in my memory, anywhere. I want to see her so I shut my eyes. To sleep.

"He's been here for a week," voices wake me up. Again.

"He lost his fiancée!" Kate yells over them.

"He lost his first love, and unborn child! This is nothing!" Sierra yells back.

"This is nothing?!"

"Woah!" Another interrupts, Ryuki. "Clam down, this isn't what any of us need right now. He lost another lover. He doesn't need this."

I raise my hands to my ears blocking them out, tucking myself, tight like a child does.

Halcyon wouldn't leave me, not like this. Not when we're getting married soon. A traditional wedding. February eight. The day she saved my life.

She saved my life and I...I couldn't do the same. Pathetic.

My body moves on it's own, an arm is hauled around someone's shoulder before the other arm is hauled too. My legs, one step at a time, are dragged forwards. I'm being moved.

I let my eyes open, seeing a car before I'm dragged into that too. The drive isn't long and I recognize the place as Ryuki's mansion when we pull up to a stop.

Inside I'm led into a room and then realize, when two sets of hands work to undress me, that Mori is here too. "Don't wash those." I mumble about the clothes.

"Don't worry about it," my brother says leading me to the shower. "Wash up." Water is already running and the door is opened for me before I step in.

In an instant the water starts to wash away what little of her I have left. She was taken away from me, snatched from right under me, slipped through my fingers. And now I have to wash her away?

Travel, Tamir, travel and fall in love again.

I'll never love again. Not the way I loved her. Never again.