heart shaped box

twenty one

<3wholesome

i stretched my arms out wide rolling onto my side letting a small sigh leave my lips, when i felt soft pair of lips press against my arm, i chuckled in my sleep tossing around my eyes open and they meet with two green ones, his smile was warm and it woke me right up.

"good morning bub." he mumbled tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, i blushed under his touch, he smiled inching closer to my body pressing his lips to mine softly kissing me, i kissed him back tangling my hands in his soft curls, pulling them so he sits up moving so he was above me, i leaned up wrapping my lips around his chain, he laughed at my stupid actions.

"you always use to do that." he mumbled i smiled remembering all the mornings we spent laying in bed together.

"merry christmas." he said.

my eyes widen.

"holy shit its christmas?" i asked. he nodded, i jumped out of bed.

he jumped out of bed with me, and i opened the curtains peeking out at the snow coating all the streets of italy. when i turned i see timmy holding a mistletoe over us. i blush.

"you know you can kiss me whenever you want." i say stepping closer to him wrapping my arms around him. "i know." he mumbled into my lips pressing them to mine, as if it were the first. he threw the mistletoe wrapping his arms around my waist i messed his hair up as he started to kiss me more, his hands roam all over my body lifting my shirt up revealing my pink lacey panties under my big white shirt. his hands moved from my apnties to my boobs cupping them both until they moved to my sides tickling me, i let out the loudest laugh our lips disconnected and he pushed me on our messy bed tickling me.

"timmy! timmy-" i laugh out he attacks my skin with kisses while his hands remained at my sides.

he stops lying his head on my chest, i was out of breath my hands moved to his chest tracing my fingers over his chest.

"what do you want for christmas?" i asked.

"to be with you all day." he replied. i gave him a squeez.

"well i didnt get you that." i said.

"you didnt have to get me anything.... i spoil you not the other way around. you being with me is already enough." he said.

"yeah thats what people who want presents say." i remark, he gets up propping himself up.

"Im serious may, i love you, and i love being with you."he said. i smiled holding his cheek in my hand, he leaned into my hand and a stroked his cheek with my thumb.

"and i love you timmy, i truly love you." i reply kissing his cheek.

"we need to get dressed and make snow angels!" i said getting up, he groaned. i walked over to my suit case pulling out some comfy jeans stepping into them taking my white shirt off clipping my bra on and sliding it on right finding a cute top i thrifted layering a jumper and a fluffy jumper over that.

timmy was laying on the bed stretched out i ran over to his suit case pulling out from his stylish clothes chucking him some warm clothes i walked over throwing his shirt over his head.

"up." i say, he obeys me throwing his arms up so i can put the shirt on him, i laughed seeing his curls are everywhere, i kiss each cheek. "were like an old married couple." i say he puts some pants on and i walk back in the room. "so your first christmas present i have already purchased." i say holding his wooley present behind my back. he rolls over watching me.

"seriously you didnt have too-awwwhhh." he says his deeper voice coming out as i hold out a beanie i picked up two for us. he jumped up bowing in front of me, i place the hat on his head adjusting it too his right comfort, his arms snake around my waist i yelp when he picks me up spinning me around.

i playfully smack his bum when he hangs me over his shoulder. Swinging me around, we're outside he swings me around dropping me in a big mountain of snow, Timmy was really worried to be recognised so we wrapped a scarf around his neck covering his mouth almost.

the only thing you could see was his wispy little curls escaping his beanie.

I'm a laughing mess when Timmy spins around landing right next to me snow splattering onto my side.

i chuckle rolling over and hugging him.
"merry Christmas."
i said.

he smiled facing me.
"merry Christmas may."
he replied kissing me slowly.
"let's go get a hot chocolate."
he says picking me up from the snow holding my hand in his as we walked from the big empty space.

Italy was decorated in Christmas decorations, lights were out, the sky was ice old, people dressed in ugly Christmas sweaters.

as we walked we shared an earphone listening to random songs that would pop up on this playlist we made drunk once as younger kids.

he sang along to a kid cudi song he loved so much when we were 18, I leaned my head on his shoulder as we walked.

he bought us some hot chocolate, I kissed his cheek before drinking some of my hot chocolate, I turned seeing a milk moustache on top of Timmy's lip.

i chuckled, brining one hand to swipe across his top lip gathering the milk licking it off.

his hand reconnected with mine, warm once again we walked down town.

"for a beautiful girl."
he says handing me a bouquet of flowers.
i press my nose to the vibrant coloured flowers.
"they're amazing."
i say.

after walking around we're back in our small hotel room, i plop down on our bed he follows when he gets a call from his mum.

my heart couldn't help but pain.
"hey mum, you liked my suit? Thank you."
he chuckled out walking around the room aimlessly.
"merry Christmas I love you more."
"thank you."
he says, he scratches the back of his neck smiling, I couldn't imagine all the beautiful comments she was showering him with, he deserved it, he was amazing.

Timothèe was the sweetest person I'd ever met, he was caring and considerate, he put others before him, he worried about other people, he blushed when you'd compliment him, he's buy you flowers or your favourite record.
he'd stay up with you all night.

he was a truly beautiful soul.
"tell Pauline I said merry Christmas and that I will be back in new York soon. Bye, bye bye love you."
he said hanging up.
"sorry she was worried she wouldn't get to say merry Christmas."
he said sitting next to me.

we sat next to each other on the bed.
"Timmy I don't think I've ever told you but the night before we officially met I nearly committed suicide."
i said.

He remained silent, so I continued.
"I was drunk and mad and upset, I wasn't myself, that night. i had way to much to drink, and I had confidence I don't really have. And somehow I wondered to the roof and I was balancing off the sides, when all of a sudden it was almost impossible to resist the urge just to, let go."
i mumble.
"and I did, but someone helped me."
he kissed my cheek.

"that was you wasn't it?"
i mumbled.

his head rested on my shoulder.
"yeah, it was me."
he replied, a shiver ran across my body, one of the most unanswered questions in my life I had just pieced together.
"you saved me."
i said.
"I could never let anything bad ever happen to you."

"I love you."