My Pleasure, Darling

6: Tragedy is a euphemism

We were, in reality, only three minutes' drive from the exit to Jinjob. And on the way in, there's a burger joint. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I like a good hot meal, and I'm sure it will do nobody any harm.

Felix sits with Andrea at a plastic table. He talks to her, I can see his mouth moving, but there are three families here and I can't hear over them. He looks comfortable enough with her, and he's within reaching distance of her, always.

What I order is a feast. I can put away five of these cheap ass burgers by myself – and that's before fries and nuggets. It's on credit, and the credit card happily accepts the payment, so I'm gonna eat. I return with the tray stacked high, and slide it on the table. Felix sits up in surprise.

"Jeez, are you hungry?"

"I am, actually. Now, Andrea, let's see what we've got. I've got a hamburger and a cheeseburger and ooh – a deluxe burger, if you really wanted it. I have some dinosaur nuggies, and fries, and I also have cheese sticks." I put them all out in a neat row for her. "Some sweet potato fries, fried chicken burgers, I've also got hot brownies and ice-cream."

We both wait in anticipation. She hesitantly reaches out for one box, then glances at me as if to ask.

"That one's the dino nuggies."

She takes it and opens it up. I supply her with a portion of fries and sauce, as well as a cold drink. She eats it readily enough. Then I slide the cheeseburger and fries towards Felix. He looks at me like I just bit him.

"I'm not hungry for this kind of thing."

"I'm sure you're not." My voice is lower than his. "But other people should see you consume food."

There's a point in my tone, to get my message across. It takes a while for him to get it. Then he rolls his eyes like I've just asked a sulky 14-year-old to clean his room and do his laundry. Sorry, buddy, but three people come into an off-road burger joint and only two of them eat? Yeah, no. Might as well wear a neon sign around your neck. VAMPIRE HERE.

He bites into the cheeseburger. It won't harm him. This I already know. Vampires, as children, consume human food like any other. As they grow, their bodies' metabolism changes, and it can no longer sustain itself on meat and nature, instead absorbing its nutrients from blood directly. With this, usually, they lose their taste for human food. They can still eat it, and drink human beverages – but it would be a slow death of starvation. Seems like a pretty worthless way to go.

In the time span it takes him to down the cheeseburger and start the fries, I've decimated the other two burgers, one of the two sets of fried chicken, and a large portion of fries with ketchup. I did eat that sandwich earlier, but it wasn't enough. Adrenaline has kept me going until now, but I am glad for the hot food. I break open a cheese stick, letting it ooze a little. Mm. Yummy.

"So, how was passing Eskalath? Many sentries?"

"One sentry. We ended up inside the city." He looks at me like he could kill me. "I didn't mean to. I took a wrong turn and suddenly, wham bam, I was in the middle of it. Stopped at the bank to grab some cash and then got out again." I omit the sound of bullets and the riot gear. He doesn't need to know that. And what's more, the six-year-old in our care doesn't need to know it either.

"Busy?"

"Sardines. I guess there was a lot of panic that went on. Hakkat is the next really big city, so we shouldn't have that problem again."

"I'm driving forever. You're not stuffing me back in the shoebox."

"Deal." I'll take it. The cheese stick is nice. Hot and a little spicy inside, ooey and gooey. I am starting to feel full again. Andrea is slowing down on her fries, her eyes scouring the table. "What are you looking for? More dino nuggies?"