Namjoon X BTS {Oneshots}

Just Jump!

⚠️Mention of suicide⚠️

Just jump Namjoon, they won't care.

"N-No... N-No I can't... I-it will pain"

No Namjoon, it will be the end of your pain and misery, just one step and you are free from all those ties and tortures.

"Wh-what about the euphoric world I-I wanted to create for my-myself"

Sobbed the 17 years old Namjoon standing on the edge of an abandoned building having an inner battle with his conscience.

They will break you completely Namjoon, by the end of those 5 years. Is it worth dying every day for another 5 years ?
"I-it isn't... B-but what if it gets better"

Do you think you can bear another 5 years of the constant torture? The constant comparison? The constant negligence? The constant pain? Each of them is never ending. Can you ??

"I-I can't... B-but maybe my parents... Th-they will understand me, ri-right??"

You still have hopes from them? Every time you tried opening up to them, they overlooked your pain. Every time they compare their struggles, their sufferings to yours.
They failed as adults to understand you. They never did, do you think they would now?

"Maybe I-I should try t-to understand them a little better a-and not complain more... Th-they will miss me..."

Everytime you wished for something, you felt guilty thinking you are troubling them. Everytime you controlled your desires thinking they have already done enough for you.
You as a fucking teenager tried to understand them the best you could but what about them? Isn't it their duty to reciprocate even 1 percent of it. How long will you suppress yourself for them ? How long, it's never ending.
If you think after 5 years, you will have the string of your life then you are wrong. All those adults out there are too ignorant to understand us.
I agree they might miss you, but why couldn't they bother to care about you when you were with them instead?

"I-I really can't ... I-it hurts so much... Everytime they say I-I don't know how to adjust. Everytime they compare their suffering to mine... Why do they think I can have the same coping capability as a-an adult... "

They will never understand you Namjoon, how many times you cried in front of them trying to explain yourself. Your pain, your physical pain , your mental pain. But did they ever understand? No! The only thing they did was to throw their frustration on your head. Aren't you too young for it?
Aren't you too young for suppressing your desires for those ignorant adults?

Just jump Namjoon, and end it all.

"Wh-what about my friends"

Do you think they would care? They never did, you were always there for them but tell me one time when they were there when you needed them . Just one time. Do you have any ?
" N-No I-I don't. Why am I so miserable. All I want is a little love and happiness"

Maybe Namjoon we could get it, if we tried to survive for another 5 years. But didn't god send us here to live, to enjoy, to love? And not suffer?
At this point you aren't living, you aren't enjoying, you are just surviving in hopes of a better future. Is it really worth it? Would a better future even mean anything if it's path would have already killed and tore you apart.

"If I jump, all of it would end ri-right?"

Yes it will, just one step and we are free from all those pain. It might hurt for a bit but after that, everything will be euphoric. We will be free. I know suicide is not an option but isn't sometimes dying all at once better than dying slowly each day as you try to make through your way past this cruel world ?
So just jump Namjoon !

And he did, leaving behind all those dreams of the world he wanted to create for himself, he left this cruel world too.

The next day it was all over the school and city, about a high school teenager jumping off the building.

His friends and school mates were shocked listening that someone as cheerful as Namjoon could do something like this. He was always the sunshine, looking after everyone and tending to them. It was unexpected for him to get to this step. Maybe they also failed to realise that all of those things he did for others were his dream life.

His parents were devastated too, seeing the body of their only son being wrapped in all those ugly white clothes.
After the funeral, his mother was too devatsed as she spent the night in Namjoon's room, as she came across the diary of her now 'dead son '
Going through it , she realised how wrong she had been.
Her son had been nothing but a pillar of support for her at every moment of life, and when her son needed her embrace , her assurance, her love. She gave him none, instead just added more to his suffering.

But now her son was gone and only regret was left !