The Invisible Planet

Part 43: Asleep

Angeline awoke to find that she wasn't alone. Lying beside her was Shay, his eyes closed and his breathing steady. A smile crept across her face and she touched his arm, expecting him to be awake.

Her heart skipped a beat in fear as he didn't respond, sending her mind into a flurry of panic.

Was he asleep? Hadn't he said he'd be in trouble for not checking in? Or had he gone to check in and then come back? And how was he asleep?

She gently shook his shoulder. "Shay?"

He stirred and his eyes blinked slowly open, his irises a soft blue for a few seconds before the red glow faded through them.

"Fuck!" he cried, jumping out of bed as though something had bit him.

"Are you okay?" she asked in concern, sitting up.

"No! Fucking Stars. Son of a—" He hurried into his clothes. "Why did you ask me to stay?!" He was furious. But there was something else, hiding beneath it.

"Because, I— I wanted you to?"

"Well, you fucking shouldn't have!" He grabbed his cloak off the floor. "I told you I couldn't! This is exactly why I should've left. Why did I fucking listen to you?"

Fear.

He was terrified, hiding it well beneath a facade of anger and taking it out on her.

She blinked in confusion. How had she noticed that?

"I thought you would just leave after I went to sleep," she defended. "I didn't even know you could sleep."

"If Marius finds out I spent the night with you, he'll kill you," he said.

"Then why the hell did you stay?" she asked, annoyed.

"It's not as if I did it on purpose. The aobana must have knocked me out. I should've left when I planned to. You can't tell anyone, alright? Not a soul. What happened last night— I'm sorry." He turned to leave, full of pain. "It  can't happen again."

Her heart sank into her stomach, burning up in its pool of acid. He didn't mean it, but he wanted to, and somehow that hurt worse. She crossed her arms and clenched her jaw, blinking back tears. "Shay, if you do this to me... if you leave like this, then don't come back," she managed, struggling to keep her voice steady. "Don't touch me, or talk to me, or look at me again, as long as I live."

His face twisted in anguish. Her words had hurt him.

Good.

"That's not fair," he uttered.

"It's not fair to me what you keep doing!" she cried, her voice breaking as she fought to keep hold of herself. "You lead me on, you— you have sex with me, and now you're gonna tell me you can't be with me? Again? I-I can't keep doing this — wondering if you give a shit about me or not, letting you hurt me over and over. If you can't admit you feel anything for me, if you can't even try to be with me, then just— stay the fuck away from me."

"Angel—" He reached for her face and she slapped his hand away with a glare.

"You were right," she said, setting her jaw. "I do deserve better."

With a pained expression, he nodded. "I know."

She watched as he left, waiting until the door shut before she sank to the floor and cried.