everyday i become the shell of the person i used to be. stress and anxiety clear on my face, the black bags under my eyes have never been so fresh nor has my hair ever looked so oily and stringy.
i'm not the 15 year old girl society sees me as, not the radiant high schooler my friends view me to be, not the fond daughter my family see.
i live to stay alive; to barely see the sunlight, touch no happiness, bear all the pain. i live the life i have crawled in because it was given not earned.
i fear for not finding love, to spend my life alone with no one by my side. i'm no beauty, that's all i can see. i'm not as smart as my friends are - i don't get perfect grades and i'm barely holding on.
i read fanfiction about the sweet kisses and waking up to cuddles, i watch movies that tell me i shouldn't give up - that life won't give it to me - that i have to fight for it.
i listen to music about loving myself, i tell myself that i've loved myself, that i'm growing into someone the past me will be proud of, someone my deceased grandpa will be proud of.
but maybe the bitter truth behind it all is that i never did.
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Nefelibata ✔ #Wattys2019
Poetry[COMPLETED] ʸᵒᵘ ᶠᵒᵘⁿᵈ ᵐᵃᵍⁱᶜ ⁱⁿ ᵐᵉ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʷᵃˢ ˡᵒⁿᵍ ᶠᵒʳᵍᵒᵗᵗᵉⁿ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵇᵒⁿᵉˢ ᵒᶠ ᵒᵘʳ ᵃⁿᶜᵉˢᵗᵒʳˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱ ᶠᵒᵘⁿᵈ ᵃ ʰᵒᵐᵉ ⁱⁿ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ⁿᵉᵛᵉʳ ᵉˣⁱˢᵗᵉᵈ ᵃⁿʸʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᵉˡˢᵉ ⁻ʷᵒˡᶠⁱᵉᵍᵉʳˢ 🎐13'10'18 - started ⛼17'12'18 - 1k 🌃26'01'19 - 2k accomplishments: 🌹16'11'18 - 2 in po...
