Unconditionally Conditioned |

•☯︎︎𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟿☯︎︎•

Jason didn't sleep that night.
He stayed confined to the sofa, his forearms were intertwined and wrapped around his knees that were now brought to his chest, crescent shapes were moulded into his upper arms from where his hands had expressed the pure hatred and disgust he felt for himself.
He stayed in that position, fixated on the wall ahead of him Unbeknown to him of the time.
He was soon snapped out of his tranced when his phone lit up his dark room just like it had last night.
Alice...
He hesitated for a second, before taking the phone Into his hands, his eyes barely able to focus at the screen.

Shorty🦕
Morningggg <3
I'm coming home todayyy
Don't worry about coming
To get me, moms taking
Me home.
Love youuu

           Jason chuckled at the girls message, clearly began able to depict the excitement she was projecting onto him through the phone. His laugh was cut short when the overwhelming pain of a headache clouding him, reminding him of what he did to himself last night.
He groaned as he pulled himself from the sofa, an indent from where he had been residing was prominent and embarrassing considering the length of time he was there.
He forced himself towards the kitchen where his painkillers lived, his eyes catching glimpse of the empty bottle he had so ignorantly demolished last night, he cringed at the sight, knowing he'd have to clean that if Alice was to come round.
After knocking back two painkillers he grabbed a broom and started to sweep up the shards of glass, scolding himself as he did so.
Once he had finally cleared up the glass with minimum injury caused, he decided to take a long needed shower to wash off the sins and anger from last night.
Grabbing his phone off of the couch he hadn't realised his phone was practically blowing up from Séan.

Séan
Dude, are you okay?

You relapsed last night

Is everything okay??

Please answer me

I'm worried

4 missed calls

Dude don't be too hard on yourself
Everyone has set backs

Please, when you're ready please
Message me

I'm always here you know that

2 missed calls

Jason let out a throaty sigh, maybe later he thought.
After setting out some clothes he turned on the shower, letting the water run hot before stepping inside, flinching at the sudden temperature change.
It didn't take long for him to become numb to the feeling. He deserved it.
The hot water tearing down his back and over his shoulders as he reminisced the horrors he allowed himself to experience last night.
What would Alice think?

Alice POV
Alice awoke with her usual routine, rubbing her eyes and blinking her set amount of times, she hauled her legs over the edge of the bed yawning as she did so.
She pulled up her phone and sent Jason a message about how her mom was taking her home and that he didn't have to come get her.
When she saw he had read it and not answered she was quite confused, it wasn't like Jason but she soon dismissed it as him just being half asleep.
After getting out of bed she fed Milo and took her meds.
"Hey Alice" her mother called from the living room.
Alice hummed in response and made her way over, plopping herself down on a seat directly opposite her.
"I've been looking into potential ways that could help with your OCD, have you ever heard of DBS?"
Alice shook her head, she'd stopped looking into ways to help combat her ocd ever since she was last sectioned a few years ago.
"It's called Deep Brain Stimulation apparently it can reduce ocd symptoms up to 60%, the reviews from health board are actually really high." Her mother explained. Alice didn't know what to think, she knew how much her ocd effects her and she guess her mother did too by the extensive research she had put in over the years to find different solutions.
"Maybe you and Jason could look at it some time, you know you don't have to consider it but for your health, maybe it would be worth a look?" He mother finished. Alice shrugged her shoulders, she never really knew what to say when it came to more adult based conversations.
Alice thought about the conversation the whole ride home, entranced in what her mother had previously mentioned
Reduce symptoms up to 60% ...
She was snapped out of thought when she recognised the familiarity of her surroundings, the apartment complex.
More than relieved to be home, she hopped out of the car with her small suitcase at her side and Milo at the other and said her goodbyes to her mother, soon making her way back to her apartment, the door closing behind her.
Everything was as she left it... or so she thought.
"I don't remember leaving Milos food in the trash" she said to herself, puzzled at the trash can that was not far from overflowing. The thought of something being off unsettled her but she tried brushing it off by unpacking.
She set out her pills ready to reorganise the next day as it would be Sunday then and that was her day for that. She put her clothes in the laundry basket, assorting the different colours and tones to avoid any colours running onto whites. After finishing up she took out her oddly full trash and finally fed Milo. After doing so she sat down in her usual spot on the sofa, far left, directly in front of the tv and left of the window, right of the kitchen and in front of the door, that was her seat, always had been.
She pulled out her phone and called Jason.

No answer

This was odd, he'd normally always answer his phone...

Jason's POV
After what felt like years of scolding, cursing, crying and everything inbetween, the sounds of the shower were soon silenced as Jason stepped out and dried himself off.
He caught glimpse of his face in the mirror. His bags were dark and purpled as if he had two black eyes, his face was red and blotchy from crying and shouting at himself, he hated it...
After dressing himself he saw the missed call from Alice.
Guessing that meant she was home. He didn't have the heart to see her, not after last night, he was ashamed of himself, disgusted by the way he was talking to her.
It wasn't long time his phone lit up once more, it was Alice, she missed him and she wanted to see him, not forgetting she also scolded him for his ignorance from the phone call, he chuckled at it.
How would he tell Alice?
What would she say?
He decided after prep talking himself for a few minutes, he'd finally go and see his neighbour.
He put on some shoes and left his still dim lit apartment.
Making his way to Alice's.
Remembering how she'd know it's him, when approaching the door he did the usual knocks.
1...2...3...4...5...
He took a deep breathe
The door swung open...