The Beta's Straight Mate (boyxboy) Bk 2

Chapter 2: ...and he thinks I'm the idiot?!

Chapter 2

 It felt like I’d checked the clock on my bedroom wall at least a hundred times already yet I still found myself looking across my room to find the little round shape which was illuminated by the moonlight.

2:00 a.m.

I felt like a worried mother hen or worse yet; a love struck obsessed fool. It wasn’t like he’d never been out this late before. Heck I wouldn’t be surprised if he came in when the sun came out. What bothered me was the reason he was so late; the cheerleader.

He was probably at her place now having the time of his life with the chick, whose name he’d likely forget by morning, while I sat in my dark room and seethed and worried and waited.

I’d actually come in at around midnight just to avoid what I was doing now. I’d stopped off at a friend’s house, we’d gone out and played pool and drank and had a whale of a time, all just so I wouldn’t have to stay up waiting for Grady, yet here I was…waiting for Grady.

I heaved a sigh of frustration before getting up and making my way over to the open window. Outside the night was still. No wind blew, I didn’t hear the scurrying of animals or insects, nor did I experience the cool wisp of wind as it caressed my face. Nothing. just complete stillness which contradicted how I was feeling inside.

Was this pathetic? To sit and hope for more? For better? No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t imagine Grady doing anything but rejecting me if I told him he was my mate. I knew him too well, I would eventually watch him fall in love with someone who wasn’t me, he’d get married and have children, maybe even move off to another country and I’d be stuck here with nothing to do but pine away, thinking about something I couldn’t have.

 My fists clenched and I found myself glaring out into the yard. The thought angered me. Why should I have to suffer for something that wasn’t even my choice to begin with? Why were the fates so cruel to hand me someone who could never love me? Was I being punished?

I unclenched my fist and rested my head on the window. This felt like punishment. Grady had no idea how much he hurt me when he did things like this, but then it wouldn’t be fair to cast blame on Grady, he had no idea he was my mate, this wasn’t his fault.

I figured I shouldn’t give up all hope though, this had to have happened for a reason, maybe, just maybe some good could come of this. Maybe I could drop little hints, start dating… -girls of course I didn’t want to shock him right off the bat- I needed to see if he’d get jealous, anything at all to show some indication that he cared for me even a fraction of the way I cared for him, and if it didn’t work I wouldn’t tell him a thing. We’d just go on the way we are now.

People often said that if a person couldn’t love you for who you are then they weren’t worth having in your life but that was bull. Those people were living a fantasy; you didn’t just drop someone because he wasn’t acting the way you wanted him to act. This was real life, even if he couldn’t love me for who I was, he was definitely worth it and nothing would change that.

It was about 3:00am when I heard the lock turning in the door downstairs. It echoed through the silent house and I angled my head towards the sound, listening as he closed the door behind him and stumbled up the stairs.

I held my breath when he paused in front of my locked door then released it when I heard him sigh and make his way over to his own room. Then I listened some more, stalking him with my ears as he flipped on his light switch and fell into bed.

 I waited till for ten minutes, guessing he was already asleep when I heard no sounds emanating from his room. Then I pushed off my bed and in no time I found myself in the hall way in front of his open door.