By Chance In Oxford

12. Lorenzo

Waking up the next morning was surreal, unimaginable. For a moment I had really believed that my mother would have been so proud of me for yesterday. I had put all my hate away and I had treated a woman with decency and love, something I hadn't done to anyone in my life. Falling asleep later that night was agonizing, I could not bring myself to do it, I was tossing and turning and could not stop thinking about how I wished to be with her. This was too much, I was in... love... was I wrong for it? I had never felt this way towards any one, any woman, any person, it was the feeling my mom had always told me to search for when I am meeting people, except with Athena I didn't have to search for it, it was written all over her. I fled the bed, showered, and put on some clothes for work, a white dress shirt, navy dress pants, and brown pointed dress shoes. Today was bound to be an eventful day. Last night, Arturo, my driver, had gotten a call from none other than papa Colombo, threatening him if I didn't answer the phone. The feeling was miserable, like my past was finally catching up to me and coming to get me punished. What could he possibly need from me? He wasn't my dad anymore, I established that more than many years ago. Getting to my office, a small rented space down the road from my place in England I was bombarded by what felt like thousands of my assistants informing me of updates I missed after shutting off my phone for my date last night, I wasn't going to allow it to get ruined by something that had to do with money, or business, and I certainly didn't want her to think I didn't have time for her because I was taking phone calls. He had screwed me over so badly there was no way in hell that I was going to let him back in, just when I was starting to find myself feeling happy. I shut the glass doors, sat at my desk and picked up the phone, where he was waiting on line 3. "Well, look, he decided to pick up his dad's phone call. How are you son?"My blood began boiling inside me, swelling my veins. I felt myself heating up, like I needed to reach through the phone and hurt him. "What have you decided to finally be a dad, finally feeling up to it! Yeah sorry it's a little late for that. What the hell do you want!? How dare you call my line after you left me as a child who had just lost their own mother. You're heartless. You need something you call someone else, you need business, do it with someone else, you're a coward.", I felt like I was facing the monster hiding under my bed for all these years, a man so brutal and I had to speak to him after years of hiding out and protecting myself. "Lorenzo, I can't talk about this with you, you know that, I had to leave, that is just how things worked out. I came to invite you, my company is expanding into a new era and I am having a masquerade ball to unveil it to everyone at my company and some much needed sponsors. I just thought you would want to come, support your father?", was he being serious? "I thought you would want to come, to every school concert, to every meeting with my principal when I acted out, to my graduation, to teach me how to drive, to watch me start my company, to every christmas, to moms funeral, to my basketball games when I became captain of the varsity team at school, to every birthday, to support your son! But no, you didn't come, you couldn't even send a card. Goodbye, try not to get poisoned at that ball, I know you can't seem to resist alcohol, and don't show up in my life ever again. You call me after not speaking to me for years of my life and leaving me wondering why I wasn't good enough for my dad to stay, asking me for sponsorship, and an appearance at your ball just to give yourself a get ahead. Not happening.", I hung up on him and had my workers block his number. This way he could never call again unless he got a new phone, which was easier for him than most. I was furious, I mean I knew people were people and they had their issues and some people just aren't good people and that is what makes society but I could not believe he had just called looking for help from me when I had looked for help from him my entire 20 years of living and he hasn't given it me ever. I spent my whole childhood longing for someone, looking for where my dad went, and now when I could care less he shows up again and pretends that he didn't leave me sitting on the front stairs crying on that beautiful July day. That was screwed up, that was the devil playing cards with me. Everything was just so fucked up, everything was a living hell, I needed to scrap every tie he ever had to me and I coudlnt, I couldnt just be the little boy who had the parents who came to their games and supported him, and loved him, and ate dinner together, I had to be the one that was wired by someone who had no experience, wired by someone who set me up for failure. I checked the date, July 9th, the anniversary of my mothers death. It was terrible of me, I had practically forgotten. I left the office and headed to the church that sat about 3 miles from my office on a gorgeous fog hidden hill. I needed to take a minute to do something for my mother, to worship her, to remember everything she was to me. Where everyone forgot about her I needed to pick up after them. The parking lot was emptying quickly meaning a mass had just finished and I had missed it, I walked into the church and knelt in a pew and began praying hoping my mom could also hear what I had to say. It was peaceful, I wanted her to know that I still cared for her and that I still knew who she was and hadn't forgotten about her. The peace ended when I felt someone kneel next to me and tap my shoulder, Athena. "Hi, oh gosh, what are you doing here!?", had I been wrong about her, was she stalking me, following my every move and now she had been here. "Hey, I come here almost everyday to talk to my mom in silence, but I go to a different church for mass because one of my friends from college and I go together. I'm surprised I haven't seen you before.", she responded. I mean I wasn't complaining that she was here, close to me again. I didn't want her to leave. "Yeah, I don't come here often except for mass, I just came because today is the anniversary of my mom's death. I value faith, religion, I really do. I was never really a big religious person but my mom always tried to get me into it and now that she is dead I have found myself begging for an anchor that will give me a sense of tranquility to fall back on. For me that happened to be christianity." She said, "I think that is beautiful of you. I couldn't agree more, only I had grown up with my religion, my aunt got me into it after my incident and it helped me overcome so much, including the trauma from what my dad put me through. The anniversary, wow. How are you feeling about all this? Are you ok? Is there anything I can do to make it a more comfortable experience?"She had her own burdens to carry, school, stress, her job, her life, and she was asking how she could help. I wanted to bring her here though, I wanted her to see what no one else has. "Actually, yes. Would you do me the honor of accompanying me to my mom's grave site? You could meet her even if she isn't really there. I've never taken anyone there before but I figured you might want to go after what we both know after last night." She lit up and said, "Oh my gosh! Of course! I would love to go with you!" Just like that we rose from the floor and walked outside into the parking lot. I had told her to follow me since we both came here separately and had our own cars with us. Just then we had arrived at the cemetery of the person I loved most in this world.