which was of course, I love you.

5.

The next morning Boris had left before I'd woken up, leaving a note. "Back to kotku's, see you soon. -Boris" I didn't mind. I needed to be alone this morning. I walk downstairs, seeing my dad was still home. Shit. He was supposed to be out doing whatever shit he does while hes away. "Oh! Morning, Theo." I force a smile. "Morning, Dad." I grab my stuff, walking towards the door. "Where are you off to?" Is he this stupid? "School, it's a Wednesday." I walk out before he could say anything, walking to the bus stop. Once I'm on the bus, Boris sits next to me. Like normal. Normal. Can we even be normal again? I hope. "Morning, Potter." "Goodmorning" I smile over at him, leaning over to kiss his cheek. He leans back quickly, looking uncomfortable. "What the fuck are you doing? I'm not your fucking boyfriend." Shit. I knew things wouldve been different. "I- uhm, I thought-" "you thought? Kotku was right about you, you're a fucking queer!" What the actual fuck? This guy literally kissed me! I couldnt say anything. I just turned away from him, staring at the passing desert. Once we got to school, I waited for everyone to get off before getting up, thanking the driver as I walked towards the school. Why the fuck did I even come to school? I decide to go to class, sitting away from my usual seat, away from boris. I'm not paying attention, just looking over at Boris every now and then. He never looks at me. Atleast not like he used to. He seems so cold now, but he was acting normal yesterday. Its strange, but I pretend not to mind. After class he migrates to her locker, which is conveniently placed in the same hallway as mine. I cant hear their conversation very well, but I know they're talking about me. At lunch, he doesn't sit next to me, as I expected. Instead he sits next to her. They're not eating, just making out. I get up in the middle of lunch, walking back inside. I must admit, I hated what they had. How touchy they were. In civics, Boris finally talked to me. It was like the conversation on the bus never happened. It was like our normal conversations, gossiping, laughing about things that happened earlier in the day. I think he felt bad for what he said, there was no way I could be sure though. He came over that night, and we talked and got shit faced. Like usual. Of course he kissed me again. Like usual. This kiss didnt seem like usual, though. It was ..unsure. like he wanted to kiss me, but he was holding back. I was sure it was because of her. I asked him about his relationship with her, what they were. He said she was his girlfriend, and then jokingly said that I would always be his side chick. I couldnt help but laugh at that, of course it was funny. Things didnt escalate much that night, just a few marks here and there. I didnt mind, it was enough for me. He was gone again in the morning, but this time, he didnt leave a note. It was unlike him, sure, but I figured he must have forgotten.