Tainted, Book One: Possessed

27. A Hole in My Chest

Kerry

"Turn it on! Turn it on! On, on, ON!"

Shocked, I palmed the wall and light flooded the room. I looked over my shoulder to see her sitting up in bed with a hand pressed to her chest. Her face was paper white, and she'd knocked her stuffed bear to the floor.

I let the door swing shut and took three quick strides to her side, then knelt on the floor and gripped the edge of the mattress as I tried to figure out what to do.

She made the choice for me when she reached out and touched one of my hands with the tips of her fingers. It was like she was asking for permission. I offered it to her and she picked it up and held it tightly between hers. When the terror in her eyes started to fade, she turned red and looked away.

"Sorry," she whispered. "I'm just more vulnerable than usual right now."

"Calm down," I whispered back, "it's okay. I'll stay with you until you fall asleep."

"You don't have to do that." She still didn't meet my eyes.

"I know I don't have to. I want to." I tugged my hand away, scooped her bear off the floor, and laid it in her lap. "Now snuggle in with your teddy and go to sleep."

"His name's Sir Martin. I couldn't sleep without my old bear, so August got me a replacement. He's not the same, but he's nice."

She hugged the bear to her, its cheek against hers, and my heart squeezed up.

Adorable. So freaking adorable.

Before I did something dumb, I turned and sat on the floor with my back against the bed. After a moment, I felt her sink back into her nest of blankets, so I stretched my legs out and tried to get comfortable on the cold tile floor.

Aw, I've slept in worse places.

I listened as her breathing settled. Her face was close enough for me to feel little puffs of air on the back of my neck.

"I'm scared of the dark," she confessed.

"I'm aware." My lips quirked up.

"Stupid, huh? I'm a coward. A baby."

"Nah. We both know what lives in the dark. Of all the fears people have, it's the one that makes the most sense."

"You aren't afraid of the dark."

"Why would I be?" I lifted one shoulder. "I have the skills and strength to fight it. And for too long, I was the dark."

"You aren't afraid of anything."

I stared at the wall. A few months ago, she woulda been right. Now, though, I had something to lose.

Someone, to be exact.

And that brought on a whole new world of worry. What if Argaud got past me? What if one of his friends did? The idea of her being hurt was a torture worse than anything I'd endured in my old life.

If anything ever happened to her...

My hands began to shake and I tucked them into my armpits.

"Kerry, can I— Would you mind if I—"

When it became clear she couldn't or wouldn't finish, I swiveled my head to look at her. Her eyes were closed and she lay on her side with one hand under her cheek. The other hung in the air above my shoulder.

She wanted to touch me again.

All right. I can suck it up and take it. For her. I owe her so much, I can give her this little thing back.