The next day we was still out of power from the storm that came through, we did some yard work to clean up any limbs that was blown in the yard.
Luckily the power came back on later that day so we was all able to take showers and get ready for bed to start the work week over.
That week was a normal week, went to work, came home, cooked and did it all over again the next day.
Friday Josh went back to the doctor to check to see if the medication was helping him, when I got off work he was at his moms and I noticed he was drinking a beer so i asked "what did the doctor say" and he never really told me he just said "I'm ok, one or two beers is not gonna hurt"
He was very distant that day, he was by his brothers truck talking to him when the kids came out wanting to stay the night with his mom, I told them " as long as she don't mind I don't mind if y'all stay"
His mom always had everyone's kids there so it was the normal for her. Josh and I got in his car and we went home but when we got there he didn't cut the car off he just sat back in his seat,
I could tell something was on his mind because he was just sitting there listening to the music that calms him down so I just sat there with him.
I looked over at him and asked "what's do you want to do?" That's when a song came on that got him excited and he said "let's go out, come on it will be fun!" It took me off guard because we had never went out together at least not to a bar, I should of said no, I should of just said let's call it a night but Josh was the type if he wanted to do something you couldn't stop him.
We went to one of my friends house to see if she wanted to go with us, when we got there both her and I saw he was starting to look like his stomach was bothering him "we don't have to go if you don't feel well" I told him but he said "I'm ok I can push through this" he replied but we still was second guessing it and he could tell by our faces that we was concerned and he said " I got this, I'll be fine"
She went to get dressed and we waited for her once she was ready I started driving towards the bar. We was all joking around and laughing on the way there, it seemed like Josh was in a better mood.
Once we got there we went inside and played a couple games of pool when Josh says "let go to the bar down the street I don't feel comfortable here" so they finished their beers and we headed out. I was the designated driver so I wasn't drinking.
I turned down the road where the bar was at, I was going to park in front of the bar so we didn't have to walk across the street when Josh said "no park in the parking lot across the street so my car don't get dented up by drunks" so I went down the road and turned around once we got parked we all stepped out, making jokes about josh looking like a pimp with two pretty ladies.
We walked to the sidewalk and looked to see if cars was coming it was a 3 lane road one going north, one going south and a turning lane in the middle. We cross the first lane my friend was walking fast so she was ahead of us and Josh was in behind her we got to the middle lane I stopped and looked to my right and seen two cars coming, I thought Josh stopped beside me. I seen how fast the first car was going and when I looked to see where Josh was he was in the middle of the lane when the car hit him!
I seen his body fly up onto the hood and into the windshield, ever cell in my body turning ice cold i screamed "JOSH!!!!" When the car stopped he rolled off the hood onto the middle lane. I ran to him as fast as I could. When I got to him his eyes was open looking at me only thing I could say was " I love you! Please stay with me!" He made a movement like he was trying to breathe, I looked him up and down to see if he was cut anywhere he was just laying there limp I grabbed his hand and started praying "please lord be with him" over and over.
There was some men at the bar that was sitting outside, they seen what happened and ran to us one said he was ex military and started doing c.p.r on him, at that time he still had a pulse so I had some hope.
One of them called 911 for us not sure who, I was crying to much I didn't pay attention to everyone around me.
When the medics got there they made everyone back away from him so they could get to Josh, I sat next to my friend on the curve across from Josh and I called his mom. She answered and I said "there's been a accident Josh is hurt bad!" She started asking "where are y'all?!" I told her where we was and she hung up to hurry to us.
I saw the medics hook Josh to the heart beat monitor and I could see he still had a heart beat the lines was moving up and down for that moment I was hopeful but then the lines went flat.
"No no no no no" he can't be dead! this can't be happening why god why? Why him? My world was crushing around my feet. My mind was lost I just wanted to scream.
I went into shock...
