Logan's Version

Logan's Version (scene 2) - Wedding Scenario

Logan: (holding a plate) I can't believe this is an "all u can eat" wedding. I haven't eaten any party rice in years
Mikey: Didn't u eat rice yesterday at my place?
Logan: Mikey, u were mourning ur pet dog (laugh track). But I've to admit, the meat was delicious. What was it made of?
Mikey: (annoyed) Dog meat?! Which my roommate tricked me into eating
Logan: I'm starting to realize u didn't love the dog so much
Mikey: That's not true
Logan: U kept complimenting the meaty paws
Mikey: Bro, "paws" right there, the meat was delicious (laugh track)
Anne: Wassup, Logan? Mikey? I happen to be a part of the bridal train, and I also get to serve. This dress is giving #AWESOME!
Mikey: We're fine. And u are looking fancy today
Anne: Oh, stop (to Logan) And how's Michael?
Logan: Michael's fine. He has actually forgiven me for pushing him off the chair earlier today (Michael walks by, stops to glare at Logan).
Michael: I am UPSET! (He storms off) [Laugh track].
Logan: See, he's happy and in high spirits
Mikey: (staring in confusion. Responds sarcastically) Yeah. Whatever u did last time, he'd be happy to take ur spirits to a higher place (laugh track)
Logan: I'd prefer to be high and mighty with the jollof rice
Zoey: (walks toward them with a plate) So sorry I took time. Someone was trying to get my autograph (excitedly) OMG! ANNE, U LOOK ADORBS!
Anne: (smiles) Thanks, gurl.
Zoey: Hey, Mikey
Mikey: (stutters) Youblook beautiful
Zoey: And u look very handsome (smiles)
Anne: (stares at the two) Do I detect something in here?
Logan: (clueless) Yes, and it's coming from the soup. (takes a spoonful from the dish and gulps) This is absolutely delicious; Willy must have it! (reaches for the dish. Laugh track is heard in the background)
Zoey: (hits his hands away) NO, absolutely not. Whatever happens, do not do the Logan thing
Logan: (faces Zoey, laughs) Come on, the Logan thing? U guys are hilarious
Mikey: (confused) What's the Logan thing?
Logan: They say that I create drama
Mikey: Yeah, don't do the Logan thing (laugh track)
Zoey: (high pitch) Yeah, u don't (Logan glares in "horror," reading the sarcasm behind the high pitch)
Anne: I hate to agree, but yeah, u do the Logan thing a lot
Logan: (annoyed) If anyone causes drama a lot, then it's Mikey
Mikey: I was tricked into eating it! Bro, let the sleeping dog lie (laugh track, while the three stare at Mikey). I thought the joke was clever. You're welcome (another laugh track)
Anne: Anyway, where's ur plate? (Mikey brings out a giant brown cooler offscreen - to Logan & Zoey's shock)
Zoey: How in the world?
Logan: Told u he's the dramatic one (laugh track)
Anne: Tell me, you're joking
Mikey: Of course I am. Why would I bring one cooler (pauses as Anme heaves a sigh of relief) when I GAT 2?! (Snaps fingers, a second one rolls in from nowhere) All better (laugh track)
Anne: (quickly turns to Logan) On second thought, I deeply apologize for thinking u were the dramatic one
Zoey: (scoffs) U will take that back, I promise
Anne: How?
Zoey: Wait for it
Groom: HEY! NO COOLERS ALLOWED! (To bride) Babe, u said ur course mates r cool
Bride: They are. (points at Logan & Princess), but I've never seen those two in my life
Zoey: (confused) U literally invited me
Bride: I did? (laugh track as Zoey glares at her) Yeah, I did. But not him (points at Logan)
Logan: (confused) We had the same yoghurt practical group in school.
Mikey: (chimes in) Yo, I dunno about what's happening, but we better gurt out of here (chuckles, but notices everyone glaring at him, laugh track)
Logan: (gives side eye) Mikey, not the time. (another laugh track)
Groom: So, what happens now?
Logan: We r going to do what every mature adult does in this situation - RUN! (Grabs the rice and stew dish, the cooler, and grabs a few chicken pieces) SAYONARA! (Dashes toward the door, but bumps into the bouncer and falls to the floor with the food while the guests stare in shock) [Indefinite laugh track]
(Bride & groom stand above Logan, in anger)
Logan: I'm in hot stew, aren't I?
Bride & Groom: Yup (bouncers lift me up to take me away)
Anne: Wow, crazy has limits, but he's a SPICY ONE
Zoey: That's what I've been trying to tell y'all (final laugh track).