Logan's Version

Logan's Version (scene 5) - I been "waiting"

(Zoey, Anne & Grace are sitting at a table in a restaurant, discussing)
Grace: So, how did your date with Trevor go?
Zoey: It wasn't a date. It was more of a hangout. As friends
Anne: Oh, don't lie to us. We're not Logan (they laugh heartily, amidst laugh track)
Zoey: Trevor and I are just friends. And I know Logan might be "crazy," but he's still my younger brother. And he doesn't cause drama
Grace: Are u talking about another Logan? Because it seems u forgot what happened at Carrie's wedding? (laugh track)
Anne: Good thing, I missed that part of the wedding. Not to be rude, but he's worse than my ex (quiet laugh track)
Zoey: (giggles) Can we not talk about Logan again? The conversation is making me go crazy (all laugh again amidst laugh track. Soon, a fine, young waiter walks to their table)
Waiter: Hello, beautiful ladies. Hope u are having a lovely evening?
Grace: Yeah, and u look lovely as well (laugh track, as Zoey, Anne, and the waiter stare at her). It was a compliment (quiet laugh track)
Waiter: What can I get you?
Zoey: I'd like the jollof rice and chicken with a bit of salad by the side and a bottle of Coke (Waiter starts to write the orders down)
Anne: Same, but without the chicken. I'd prefer beef instead
Waiter: OK, written down (turns to Grace) And what shall I get you, Miss?
Grace: (quickly) You (smiles as the waiter stares shyly, but that smile fades faster than the speed of light when she notices Princess & Anne's deadly glares. Stutters) You, um, should get me fried rice instead. Made with those fine hands you have
Waiter: (grins shyly) As u request. I'll be right back with your orders (leaves)
Grace: (smiles as her eyes follow the waiter heading to the counter, turns to meet her friends' glares) I'm starting to wonder if I'm the dessert u people will end up devouring after eating rice (laugh track)
Anne: Grace, seriously, what was that?
Grace: Excuse me for being so direct
Zoey: I mean, is that what u call "direct"? U need to upgrade and tell him that u like him
Anne: Zoey, she can't just say it like that
Zoey: I know, which is why u need an expert to tell u how to do it (exhales in frustration) Like Logan (the three groan)
Anne: No, of all people. What of Mikey?
Zoey: He's at home. And yes, I know it sounds crazy, but Logan knows about all those things despite being a hopeless romantic (laugh track)
Grace: But, he's so fine. And he has dimples, Zoey. Dimples! (laugh track) The emphasis on the dimples
Anne: Aren't dimples a bit overrated? I mean
Zoey: Tell me about it. U remember Neil? He has them, and because of that, he wouldn't stop smiling -
Anne: (smiles, cuts in) That's actually cute
Zoey: (finishes, with a blank expression on her face) at other girls (laugh track)
Grace: (concerned) Wow, it must have been frustrating
Waiter: (arrives with orders) Sorry I took so long with the orders (serves Grace first) And whoever that Neil is, he needs new scars on his cheeks (laugh track)
Anne: Didn't we order first?
Waiter: Ladies, chill. The prettier one first (smiles at Grace, who blushes)
Zoey: (smirks for a while till the compliment kicks in. Glares at the waiter) Hey, don't u dare put it that way! I'll let you know I won a Miss LA beauty pageant three years in a row for actresses only, Mister (reads name tag) Mr Jay (Jay stares in surprise). If that's your real name
Jay: Hey, u sound just like your brother
Anne: (tries to mediate) OK, Princess, hold your horses (laugh track) She's just a bit stressed
Jay: It's OK. I understand, being on set every day and being Logan's sister (the three ladies stare in surprise)
Zoey: How do u know that?
Jay: I'm a fan of u both
Zoey: (scoffs) More like a stalker fan
Jay: If I were a stalker fan, I'd have shrieked and hugged u three times already. But not to worry, my friend over there IS the stalker fan. So I advise u to pack those and make a run for it in 5 minutes (points at a waitress at the counter, who's squealing quietly, while mouthing, "OMG! It's Zoey Harper!" followed by laugh track)
Zoey: (waves back nervously) Such an adoring fan? (laugh track) Sorry about the outburst.
Jay: Nah, it's cool. (Two other waiters serve Anne & Zoey their orders in plastic plates, while Jay gives Grace a piece of paper) Gimme your number, so I'll call u (smiles, while Grace does the needful and returns the paper. Jay leaves)
Anne: That wasn't so bad. Now, nothing can ruin this girl's evening hangout
Logan: (Runs in, breathing quickly) Hey, ladies
Zoey: (whispers to Anne) Nothing can ruin it, but someone can (laugh track)
Logan: Did u not get my text? Mr. Ivan is on fire! Seriously, I accidentally set his hair on fire (laugh track). But u were supposed to shoot the next scene 10 minutes ago
Zoey: What? Why didn't u - (goes through her phone, realizes why she didn't get the text. She responds in a mocking tone. "Oh yeah. I put ur number on my Top 40 blocked numbers list. And guess what? You're number 1 - for two hours straight (laugh track, followed by applause)
Logan: (glares, replies with sarcasm) Wow, I'm flattered (laugh track) Let's just leave now to avoid getting fired (glances down at the plates) U got all this for me, sis? (smiles at Zoey, sits to have a taste of her food) I take back everything I said about u being annoying on the Late Late show
Zoey: (glares) Wow, Logan. I thought I was the only one who felt that way about their sibling (laugh track. She suddenly has an idea) U know what? This is for you, while the others are for us, right ladies? (makes eye contact with Anne & Grace; both quickly understand her)
Anne: Yes, we should get going (puts the packed plates of food in her bag). We'll see you in an hour, Logan (the three briskly leave)
Logan: (confused) In an hour, why did they -
Jay: (smirks) Wait for it
Waitress fan: EVERYONE! LOGAN IS IN THE RESTAURANT!!! (Excited high-pitched squeals are heard in the background)
Logan: Nope (Grabs the chicken and dashes toward the door as the waitress and few other ladies chase after him. Laugh track)
Waitress: GET HIM BACK!!! (Logan narrowly escapes them after falling once and running out of the restaurant)
(infinite laugh track as scene closes)