Logan's Version

Logan's Version (scene 14) - 2 broke boys

Logan & Zoey are at a restaurant, standing by the counter and staring at someone offscreen. They sip their Coca-Cola drinks while discussing in low tones - I think [laugh track]
Logan: I feel bad about that guy over there. He looks like very worried (sips his drink again).
Zoey: True, but not a very nice thing to say, Logan. I wish I could find out what's wrong.
Logan: (nonchalant) Or we could ask him to take life easy and leave.
Zoey: (faces Logan sharply) Logan, that's my boyfriend we're talking about. (Camera reveals a saddened Trevor seating by himself and eating chicken wings) [laugh track]
Logan: (surprised) We were talking about Trevor? I thought u meant the guy behind him
Zoey: (rolls eyes) That's Mikey [laugh track]. They asked us to meet here.
Logan: And I ask not to be a part of it.
Zoey: Quit your whining and just follow my lead. (The two walk up to Mikey and Trevor, who are now seated) Hey, babe. Mikey. We're so sorry we're late.
Trevor: (confused) Who's we?
Zoey: What do you mean? I mean we - (turns back to see that Logan is nowhere to be found) [laugh track] (Zoey mutters under her breath) Coward [Another laugh track].
Mikey: What's his excuse this time?
Zoey: (sits beside them) I don't know, and I don't care. After all, he has a show now. (sips her drink) Anyway, Mikey? What is the urgent meeting u called us for?
Mikey: I need your help to get Trevor and me, a sweet music gig at this amazing restaurant tonight.
Trevor: We need the extra cash for the rent, and Mikey needs some of that to take the waitress over there to dinner (points at a tall, dark, and busty waitress at the counter, cleaning one of the wine glass cups).
Zoey: (gushes) Michael has a crush, that's interesting. (sarcastic) I hope she stays [laugh track]
Trevor: Your dates almost always never want to stay.
Mikey: (defensive) Not to brag, but I don't have any relationship faults.
Zoey: Your driving IS your relationship fault [laugh track]. If I remember collectively, Kendra passed out -
Trevor: Drea kept screaming and almost had a heart attack
Zoey: And Phoebe went into labor without you realizing. Good thing she survived
Trevor: Phoebe Thunderman?
Zoey/Trevor: Eww [laugh track].
Zoey: Good thing, I know the manager. And I'll try to speak with him to let you do your gig thing. As long as you fix your driving problem.
Mikey: Thanks, Zoey.
Zoey: Just out of curiosity, what is the name of your band?
Mikey/Trevor: (smirk at each other before responding in unison) 2 Broke Boys!
Zoey: (trying to be confused) Excuse me? [laugh track]
Trevor: Yeah, 2 Broke Boys who will eventually be rich and famous someday
Zoey: (sarcastic) Or 2 Broke Boys that could get sued by 2 Broke Girls for the crime of dumbing down their names, and literally becoming 2 Broke Boys [laugh track]
Mikey: Sure thing, Zoey 2.0, we'll look for a better name [Another laugh track].
Zoey: (stands up) Shoot your shot while I do my part in helping. And Mikey, don't tell the waitress your band name is 2 Broke Boys. She might be Max in disguise [laugh track and applause] (she leaves as Mikey stares in wonder).
Trevor: (faces Mikey) I'd honestly listen to Zoey if you know what's good for you. I've met a waitress who acts exactly like Oleg [laugh track]
Mikey: All these Broke jokes are actually going to make me "broke" faster than Caroline's dad (palms his face as he realizes what he just did). Great, now, I sound like Max! [laugh track]
Trevor: (sees the waitress about to leave, tells Mikey in a supportive tone) Bro, u better talk to her now. She's about to leave.
Mikey: Wish me luck.
Trevor: (bluntly) Don't make me say a Max Black joke [laugh track].
Mikey: (rolls eyes as he walks up to the busty waitress) Hello, pretty lady - (reads name tag) I mean, Tracy. How u doing?
Tracy: (cleaning another wine glass) Yeah, I'm good. Just another day working in a diner, so "Lee" fully.
Mikey: (gasps) Max, is that you? [both laugh, alongside laugh track]
Tracy: Yeah, I get that a lot. That I act and give off Max vibes. And in case you're wondering, I do not have a previously wealthy roommate [laugh track].
Mikey: That's a relief. Besides, my friend and I are in a band. We hope to book a gig here, and afterward, I could take you out to dinner soon.
Tracy: (grins) I'd love to go to dinner with you. (wonders) What's the name of your band, though?
Mikey: (proudly) 2 Broke Boys
Tracy: (laughs loudly) [laugh track] 2 Broke Boys?! U are SO LUCKY, I'm not in one of Max's moods today, or u would have gotten your heart "broken" by now. (The two share a hearty laugh. Meanwhile, Zoey and Trevor watch from a distance, impressed at the turnout of events)
Zoey: I'm so glad that everything is working out as expected. And also relieved we didn't meet that way [laugh track].
Trevor: U give off the Max vibes, though, and we still need a Caroline.
Zoey: It's settled. If there is ever a movie based on 2 Broke Girls, we are getting Logan to audition as Caroline.
Trevor: Agreed! (shakes hands with Zoey, as though they are making a deal)
Michael: (behind them) Me too. (Both Zoey and Trevor jolt in surprise)
Zoey: Michael, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be with Logan.
Michael: Logan's at the other side of the road. He said something about getting cupcakes for you guys.
Trevor: (hugs Zoey) I can't agree with u more right now. For Logan to get cupcakes, that is a very sweet thing to do.
Zoey: A very Caroline thing to do (winks) [laugh track].
Michael: (staring at the phone in his hand) First off, gross. Also, I follow Max and Caroline on IG. Max says, "Please stop with the Broke Girls jokes. It makes me want to actually break y'all in pieces."
Zoey: Is that Logan's phone?
Michael: (ignores them) Also, Caroline adds, "Sweet, but there's a kid with you. I will end u if you don't stop the cupcake jokes." [laugh track] (Zoey and Trevor look at each other in mock terror, before releasing themselves from their hug)
Trevor: On second thought, we'll ask them first before we make any more word plays. (Soon, a cha-ching sound is heard. Trevor brings our his phone from his pocket) Babe, I just got paid $40 by Mr Jeremy.
Zoey: That's great. (pauses, then has a strange realization) Trev', the alert sounds like the ending of every Broke Girls episode.
Trevor: (horrified) OH, no [laugh track]. (carries Michael suddenly and says to no one in particular) If u can hear us - or read us - it was not intentional. (to Zoey) Let's meet Caroline, I mean Logan,  across the street or the real one will "end us!"
Zoey: Agreed (The three quickly leave the restaurant). [laugh track]
(Meanwhile, Mikey and Tracy are at the counter, laughing at the three).
Tracy: (holds up her phone - implying she had made the sound) I had to stop them one way or another. The jokes are killing me!
Mikey: I swear [laugh track]. So, you're done with your shift. Shall we?
Tracy: We shall. (drops the wine glass and walks out of the restaurant with Mikey) [Laugh track and applause as the scene ends - with the "cha-ching" sound heard - in similar fashion to 2 Broke Girls endings...]