October 28, 2015

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Dear You,
This is it, the day I dreaded the most.
My mothers death anniversary.
Can't believe it's been 7 years.
Wow..

I walked into school today, and I just couldn't do it. I felt tears brim in my eyes, the moment I stepped into the building. I had to go to the bathroom stall to calm myself, but I just couldn't do it either.

I sobbed, and tried to tell myself it'll be alright. I knew mom wouldn't want me crying about her. She would want me to be happy and continue to live the life she's given me. It's impossible to do so.
How can you just go on with life, not having someone who was very close to you?

How that's possible? I don't understand that.

I love her, and I wish I can think it's okay, but it's not.

How can life be so cruel and take the kindest soul that I know?

Why did she have to die, when she did nothing wrong?

She had a reason to live, and she had a purpose here, and she was taken away.

How could she be gone?

How?

This is why I'm afraid to get close to anyone. I'm afraid to lose them, just like I lost her.

I lost the most important person I had in my life, and I can't lose anymore. It hurts too much, so much, and sometimes I feel like no one understands that.

From, Me

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