All Shall Fade (LOTR-Wattys 2014)

All Shall Fade - Chapter 18 - Reasons Unknown

All Shall Fade

Chapter 18

Reasons Unknown

We were lead to a small chamber on the forest floor, nestled between the massive roots of a tree and comfortably furnished with cushions and blankets. I found myself a bed and shrugged off my pack, wincing as it caught my shoulder. Something was definitely out of place there, just hoped nothing was broken. I sighed and laid my weapons, coat and cloak aside. It seemed almost warm here under the pale elvish lights, despite the winter that lingered outside the boarders of the forest. I brushed down my long burgundy shirt that I was wearing and stepped outside, ducking beneath the white tent that marked the entrance of our shelter. I could hear singing faintly echoing through the forest, and although it was in Elvish I still listened, almost bumping into Legolas as he walked past, holding a silver urn of water.

“A lament for Gandalf.” He murmured as I closed my eyes and listened to the distant, mournful voices.

“It’s sad.” I whispered, blinking and walking over to one of the larger roots, where I sat down.

“What do they say about him?” Merry asked from where he sat in our shelter. I glanced back at him, spotting the other Hobbits laying out their bedding as Gimli snored, already sleeping as Aragorn sat beside him, sharpening his sword on his whetstone. I searched for Boromir and spotted him sitting on a root not far from me.

“I have not the heart to tell you. For me the grief is still too near.” Legolas murmured sadly, and I stared at him for a moment. The loss of Gandalf was hitting him hard, he wasn’t used to the after-effects of death, and I saw how difficult it was for him to wrap his mind around the fact that the wizard would not be coming back. I smiled weakly at him as the singing continued.

“I bet they don't mention his fireworks. There should be a verse about them.” Sam said, and I saw him slowly rise to his feet, “The finest rockets ever seen, they burst in stars of blue and green. Or after thunder, silver showers, came falling like a rain of flowers...” He trailed off, looking around as I smiled a little, “Oh that doesn't do them justice by a long road.”

“I’m sure it does.” I murmured, “I would have liked to have seen them.” Sam glanced up at me and smiled sadly as he sat down again. Legolas walked over to me and sat down beside me.

“Are you alright?” He asked and I almost laughed.

“Do I look alright?” I scoffed, “I’m in a strange world, surrounded by people I’ve only recently met, the one person who would have been able to help me get home is gone, I’m hearing voices in my head, I’ve got a screwed up shoulder and I recently became a killer.” I listed breathlessly as tears pooled in my eyes, “Where in all that does the word ‘alright’ appear?” I sniffed, rubbing at my eyes as Legolas looked at me, confusion and hurt crossing his porcelain features. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, looking up at him, “I shouldn’t have snapped at you, you were only trying to be nice…” I sighed and stared down at the ground. “I’m such a mess.” I muttered to myself as I felt him lightly touch my shoulder. I glanced up as he pulled me into a hug, being careful not to nudge my shoulder. I buried my head in his chest, feeling tears escape my closed eyes.

“I would be sad if you left.” He murmured softly.

“I would be sad too, I’d miss everyone.” I whispered, “But I have to go back, I don’t belong here.” I sighed sadly as I sat back.

“You belong in the Fellowship.” His quiet words made fresh tears prick at my eyes.

“Thanks.” I smiled, “That’s sweet of you to say.” I reached out and took his hand, squeezing it a little as I dried my eyes on the sleeve of my shirt.