All Shall Fade (LOTR-Wattys 2014)

All Shall Fade - Chapter 34 - Lean on Me

All Shall Fade

Chapter 34

Lean on Me

I felt my throat tighten as Aragorn and I stared at each other for an impossibly long moment, before I turned on my heel and continued walking down the hallway, blushing furiously as I went.

“Alice, wait.” I didn’t stop when he called for me, or even when I heard him running after me. I only stopped when he caught my arm, in an attempt to pull me back, but I planted my feet firmly where I stood and looked down, refusing to turn and look at him. I listened as he breathed heavily over my shoulder, making my exposed skin prickle, before his hand slipped away from where he had been holding me. I bit my lip, realising that I couldn’t keep running from him like this. I needed answers, or I was going to go mad.

“When are we going to talk about this?” I whispered, and I heard him take a deep breath before answering.

“Talk about what?”

I span on my heel angrily to face him, “This!” I gestured to the space between us, “Us! The kiss!” I could see the clear bewilderment on his face as I balled my hands into fists at my sides. “At first I thought it didn’t mean anything, but it did mean something to me. And I was alright with it not meaning anything to you, I thought I could just ignore it, and whatever I’d felt would go away, but you keep confusing me!” My voice rose in volume until I was almost shouting, “You keep doing things that are nearly driving me mad! You’re behaving like nothing happened, and then you do things like telling me I look beautiful – which guys only do when they like a girl – and then you totally ignore me?” I growled under my breath in frustration, turning away from him to make sure I didn’t do anything stupid, like set free the angry tears that threatened to fall from my eyes. “You can’t just go around kissing people you don’t care about… It really messes them up.” I choked, holding my arms across my chest as I sensed him take a deliberate step towards me, grabbing my shoulders and spinning me around to face him, his hands firmly gripping my bare shoulders as his darkened eyes stared into mine.

“Don’t make the mistake of thinking I don’t care about you, Alice.” He murmured, and I could see the effort he was making to remain calm as he reached up to gently cup my face in one of his hands. “I just… I just need more time to think. I’m confused too.”

I frowned and angrily jerked away from him, taking a step back to put as much distance as possible between our bodies. “Don’t be telling me that you’re a victim here when you started all of this.” I hissed, “The world doesn’t revolve around you, Your Highness.” I spat the last words in a fit of anger, and then instantly regretted them as I saw the pained expression they painted across Aragorn’s features, before he turned away, opening a door in the hallway and walking through it, closing it quietly behind him as I sighed, listening as his footsteps faded away. “Sorry…” I whispered to the closed door, “I didn’t mean it.” I backed up until my back met the wall of the hallway and I slid to the floor, kicking off my boots and curling my knees up to my chest. That had been a low blow. I’d always sensed that he’d been sensitive about the whole linage thing that was shadowing him, and there I was, dragging it up just to spite him, when really I was only angry at myself. I felt a few hot, angry tears roll down my cheeks, but they didn’t last very long, and I wiped them away on the sleeve of my dress. I knew I should go and apologise, but it was difficult to swallow my pride, even though I knew I was in the wrong here. Sighing, I buried my head in my knees, waiting until I could work up the courage to go talk to him. Luckily, this hallway seemed to be relatively unused, and I remained undisturbed with my thoughts, with only the chilly night air for company. I kept replaying our conversation over and over in my mind, wondering why we always ended up fighting with each other when we were alone. Maybe it was a sign that we just shouldn’t be together. But if we could hardly be civil to each other, why was it that we kept getting swept up in these intimate moments? Whatever was going on between us, I knew I had to talk it over with him before it would make any sense.