All Shall Fade (LOTR-Wattys 2014)

All Shall Fade - Chapter 47 - Whispers of the Heart

All Shall Fade

Chapter 47

Whispers of the Heart

‘How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand… There is no going back.’

*

“Alice…”

I squeezed my eyes shut in an attempt to block out the soft voice calling my name. I didn’t want to speak to anyone right now.

“Alice…”

“Go away.” I whispered, feeling a tear slide down my cheek as someone lightly touched my shoulder.

“We both know you do not want that.”

I tensed as I felt the person sit down beside me on the bed I was lying on, and I looked up curiously, sighing as I recognised the familiar form of Arwen, perched on the side of my bed in this make-believe version of Rivendell she had created.

“Long time no see.” I muttered, sitting up as she smiled gently.

“I understand you have a choice to make.”

“Yeah… And I don’t particularly want to make it.” I mumbled, “I was happy enough to think I would be living out the rest of my life in Middle Earth, I didn’t think I had a choice in the matter but now that I do… I don’t know what I want.”

“Do you wish to return to your world?” She asked, and I bit my lip.

“I’d like to… So I could see everyone. My friends and family… But the fact that I could never return here if I did go changes things. I miss my old life but what if I missed this one even more? What if I couldn’t go back to the way I was because of the things I’ve done here? I’m a killer here! That doesn’t exactly go down well in the 21st Century.” I ran one hand through my hair as I further debated my choice. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“You will make the right choice. I know you will.” Arwen said, smiling at me as I wiped a tear from my eye.

“But how do I know which one is the right one?”

“You will know when you have made your decision.”

“Well that’s useful…” I grumbled sceptically as she stood. “Where are you going?”

“I cannot stay Alice.” She murmured apologetically. “I’m afraid this is the last time we will see each other.”

“What?” I cried, “Why?”

“After you have made your choice you will no longer need me to guide you.”

“B-but if I chose to leave, wouldn’t I see you in the Undying Lands?”

Arwen only smiled as she began to walk away from me into a glowing white light behind her. “Arwen wait! Don’t go!”

“I have to.” She murmured, pausing as I climbed out of the bed and ran to her. “I will miss you, Alice.”

“I’ll miss you too.” I whimpered pitifully as I hugged her tightly. She gently pulled away and smiled at me, holding my shoulders comfortingly.

“Goodbye Alice.”

“Goodbye.” I whispered softly, closing my eyes as the room faded away, and Arwen’s echoing voice drifted away from me as I descended into darkness.