The Final Countdown - Season I

Episode I: Part 4: Mustard and Coronaries

Eddie slammed the last dregs of tea down his gullet (slamming things down one's esophagus just sounded dangerous, but a gullet was much more rugged) and tucked his mug away on a nearby shelf.

A familiar chime dinged from his pocket. He pulled out his phone and gave it a swipe. As he stared at the screen, his face clouded over.

"Crap. Less than a day to go." He tucked the phone back into the pocket of his cargo shorts (more pockets = more awesome) and cracked his neck to loosen up. "I'd better get to work."

They say that geniuses (genii...genia...really smart people) talk to themselves because that's the only way they can be sure of an intelligent conversation. In this case, it was because nobody else wanted to listen.

He grabbed his toolbelt, hooked it on, and rubbed his hands together. With one move, smoother than any he'd ever made in his entire life, he yanked the enormous blue tarp off the mystery in the middle. 

"What in the hell is that?"

Eddie shrieked like a toddler and jumped so hard his toolbelt fell off. He spun around and stared at the doorway.

"Jesus Christ!" He clutched his heart with one hand and grabbed his toolbelt off the ground with the other.

"Nope, just Ronnie." The surprise visitor squeezed through the gaps in the boxes, and Eddie wished that he'd remembered to close the garage door. "I've brought back your lizard cage."

Ronnie had a terrarium tucked under her arm, and a half-eaten submarine sandwich in the other. She sidled right up to the Final Countdown and leaned into it. A dollop of mustard hung from the edge of her snack for just a moment before landing with a soft splorch on the invention.

"Ronnie...hi...how nice to see you."

Ronnie handed over the terrarium and knocked the Final Countdown with a meaty fist. A resounding kang echoed through the garage.

"Seriously," she said. "What the hell is it?"