Chapter 23

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Kanda stares at Allen with a blank face. I can't tell him. It's the only thing he's holding onto right now.
"Why would I love a pathetic bean like you?" Kanda snaps back.
Allen cast his eyes to the ground. 'Oh' was the only reaction Kanda got. He felt disappointed yet relieved. Kanda will never love someone like him. What would I have done if he said yes? Allen shook his head and looked back at Kanda.
"I want to believe that this is real." Allen stood up and quickly walked away from Kanda.
      Kanda sighed, frustrated. If only he had went with the bean on the train. Kanda cursed himself. He wasn't one that questions his actions, but he can't help it now. All the blame was on him.
        Kanda grumbled as he stood up and headed back in the direction of the house.
       When Kanda walked in it looked as if nothing of the last two months happened. Allen was pleasantly chatting with Lenalee, while Marie nodded his head and occasionally added his input.
         Lavi, however still couldn't get close to Allen. He was sitting in the other side of the room with his brows furrowed. You could tell he wanted to go talk to the bean but he couldn't. Every time Allen and him met eyes the bean would flinch, and Lavi would look away, the hurt evident in his eyes.
        "We're leaving in the morning" Kanda said without any room for arguing.
       "But Kanda! Allen is still really hurt. We can't leave!" Lenalee yelled.
       "Would it be better to be attacked by Noah when the bean can hardly move?" Kanda leaned on one hip and put his hand on his swords hilt. It was as if he was saying 'go ahead and try to argue'. Lenalee nodded, now understanding Kanda's reasons.
        Marie and Kanda started packing while Lavi mapped our their route. Lenalee stayed with Allen helping him.
        Allens innocents was healing him, but with all the scarring and damage it was taking to slow. His innocence couldn't catch up to his minds expectations.
       "Oi beansprout come here!" Kanda yelled. Lenalee rushes over to Allen to help him stand but Allen put his hand out.
       "I'm fine. Really" Standing up in his condition was probably one of the most difficult things he's ever done in his life, but he managed. He needed to try and look capable. He can't let the other worry about him. He'll only get in the way, and he knew that.
      Allen made his was to the room Kanda was in with the help of the wall. Right when he was out of the others sight he collapsed into the wall, his breath coming out in heavy pants.
        Allen put all his weight on the wall while walking. When he got to the door of the room Kanda was in he stood up and slowed his breath.
       "You called me Kanda?" Allen said through the door.
       The door swung open quickly and revealed Kanda standing there with a very displeased face.
        "Here" Kanda shoved a pile of clothes at Allen.
        "They won't fit; but I need my coat back and you're still naked" Allen looked down and just now realized he was only wearing Kanda's exorcist jacket. His face went beet red and Allen snatched the clothes from Kanda.
        Allen was planning on going into another room close by, but he fell on the ground. A few of his wounds reopened when he stood up earlier.
       Kanda rolled his eyes. He picked up the bean and carried him into the room then sat him down on the bed.
       "Change in here" Kanda said before leaving the room. Slamming the door behind him.
Allen stared at the now closed door. Kanda seems... different. It was making his heart swell. He could feel little tingles of happiness under his skin. However, there was still lingering doubt in the back of Allens mind.
What if this is fake? He had no idea what to believe, but for the time being he would listen to Kanda's words.
"Which reality do you want to be real?" Those words were the only thing keeping him sane right now.
       Allen sighed and began to change. There was no use brooding over this. For now I just need to sort my thoughts out.

Sadly. He would never get the chance.
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Sorry short chapter. 
I hope you like this, I'm not to content with where this went, but it'll have to work.

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