Running on Insulin

Chapter 59

Tyler POV

We sat up with Samantha for probably another hour. She cried a little bit longer, and wound up falling asleep in Jenna's arms, sitting on the floor in the living room. Neither of them realized I'd also started crying when Jenna was telling her how much she meant to us and how much we love her.

Around one in the morning, I picked her up and carried  her upstairs to her room. I checked her blood sugar with her kit, tucked her back into bed, and went back to our room. I didn't think that we were going to have any more problems with Samantha sneaking out that night.

In the morning, Jenna and Josh had already gotten up and were downstairs preparing breakfast.  I knocked on Samantha's door, and told her it was time to get up. I peeked my head inside and saw her lying on her bed, eyes open.

"Let's go kiddo. Breakfast and school," I said. She looked in my direction, looked away, and then sat up and went into her bathroom.

I went downstairs and poured myself a cup of coffee. Jenna was making pancakes and Josh was cooking up some bacon.

"Man, this kid gets the best breakfasts," I said. "My mom was too busy getting herself ready for work and us ready for school to give us more than toast, Pop Tarts or cereal."

"I'm happy I'm able to be home to make breakfast. And right now, grateful that I have Josh to make part of it, too."

Josh grinned at me.

"Is Samantha awake?" Jenna asked me, looking at the clock.

"Yeah. She's just in the bathroom. She should be down any minute," I said.

And just then, Samantha came into the kitchen and sat on a stool at the breakfast bar. She didn't say a word and she didn't look at any of us. She tested her sugar and took her insulin without any issue and sat, looking down at the countertop.

"Morning, sunshine," Jenna said brightly. "How'd you sleep?"

Samantha shrugged.

I went over to her and gave her a hug and a kiss on the head.

"Morning, kiddo," I said. "How're you feeling?"

She looked up at me.

"You guys aren't mad at me?" she asked, looking between Jenna and I.

"Why would we be mad at you?" I asked.

"For trying to run away last night?"

"Of course we're not mad at you for that," Jenna said.

"Honey," I said. "We understand you're still very upset about everything that's been going on. It's okay. We're not mad at you for thinking that running away was a solution. You have a lot going on. It's okay. We can't be mad at you for trying to protect us, even as we're trying to protect you."

Samantha sighed.

"I feel so stupid," she said.

"Don't feel stupid. You're not stupid," I said. "You're a kid.  A kid with a lot of things in her past that most people don't deal with. You're strong. You're a survivor. And it's going to take time for you to learn to move past the things that have happened in your past. Some of it you may never move past, but that's okay. We have Dr. Freud, who will help, and you have me, and Jenna."

Jenna put a plate in front of Samantha and came around the island and hugged her.

"We're going to help you through all of this, sweetheart. We're going to be with you all the way. We may not understand everything you've been through, but we will be here to help you. We're not going to abandon you."

Samantha picked at her food, but ate. I sat beside her drinking my coffee.

"Samantha," Jenna said. "I can't make you feel better, but I really want you to. I want you to understand, you are very much loved."

Samantha looked up at her.

"You guys keep saying that, but, after my mom died, I stopped hearing that. My dad - Stanley - never loved me. He never, ever said it. I kind of stopped understanding what it even meant, really."

"Oh, sweetheart," Jenna said, tears in her eyes again, "Being loved means that even when you mess up, or do something that might get you into trouble, or even does, the people who really care about you, keep on caring about, and for you. It's making sure you're safe, and healthy. But it's more than making sure you have food and medicine and all that. It's also about making sure that when you do make a mistake, even if you do get into trouble, that you're treated with respect and dignity. You know, like, trying to run away last night. We weren't happy, in fact we were more sad than anything. But we understand, and we talked about it, and no one got hurt, right?"

Samantha nodded.

"It's when someone gets upset and can't necessarily control themselves. Maybe because they have low blood sugar or something? And they throw a plate and it breaks. Loving someone means you understand it was an accident and that the person is probably sorry once they understand what's happened. Or, maybe they drop a glass because it slips out of their hand.  Well, it's not getting mad at someone for a small accident like that."

Samantha smiled just a little.

"It's so much more than that, really. But in a nutshell, it's taking in some kid who lands in your back yard in a rainstorm, and making her your daughter, because she needs a loving family," I said.

Samantha actually laughed.

"Better?" I asked. She nodded.

"So are we still on for lunch today?" Jenna asked.

"If you still want to take me, I guess," Samantha said.

"Of course I do!" Jenna said. "What time do you have lunch?"

"12:30," Samantha said. "I think I need a note, though."

"Okay. Well, I'm going to come into school with you this morning to let the office know the adoption was finalized yesterday. And that you'll be away again tomorrow."

"Okay," Samantha said.

She finished her breakfast with more gusto than she'd began.

Jenna and Sam left for school and I stayed at the breakfast bar for a minute.

"Whew," Josh said. "That kid is something."

"She sure is," I smiled.