psychos' love | heehoon

6 | Coincidences

Shutting the door, he slid down on the floor, puffing out air. It felt like it all started to work all of a sudden. The pace at which things were taking a turn fastened rapidly. Not that Heeseung didn't like it, however this refreshing feeling of excitement slowly began becoming a part of his daily routine.

He knew he had to take control over it, otherwise he will lose his "cool" which was he used to fake at times. It would ruin his reputation and could lead into some bigger issues.

The main question though was if Sunghoon did that thing on purpose. Heseung couldn't get any evidence supporting the thought.

While thinking hard, 'Wait, what about that weird letter or whatever,' A memory came through his mind suddenly.

He remembered the odd paper lying on his doormat. Perhaps it was related to the whole incident, but how could the dots be connected, they were very separate cases, right?

Heeseung held his head in his hand, thinking of the mere possibility. Anything that could somehow help him with solving the case needed to be considered.

He clicked his tongue from the annoyance, "Why am I so stupid, why didn't I keep the paper, now either I am taking it too far or something is really up," said, frustrated.

Even if he didn't have any clues, he knew his brain wouldn't be remembering such trivial event without a reason. He believed intuition is a reliable source of support so he almost never ignored it's hints.

With a heavy sigh, he stood up and messily plodded to the bedroom, feeling exhausted by the amount of things that had happened throughout the day.

Once lying on the bed, he stared at the ceiling with his mind empty. All those experiences were fun for him, tiring but entertaining.

Some unknown voices in his head told him to dive into this. To achieve what he wanted and play on the edge of morality that for the time being seemed nothing extraordinary, but rather typical school crush situation.

Knowing Heeseung, the boy wouldn't let any opportunity like that one to simply be wasted. He really craved for action in his life.

The hesitation was present too. Because Heeseung didn't want to lose his sanity, he repeatedly ranalysed every little decision of his. It could've been called monotonous or boring, but it played an essential role in his opinion.

Another explanation could be that he waited for the final turn, the last sign that would tell him it's all actually happening - not just in his daydreams.

'Just one more time, any form of hint, I swear,' ge desperately wanted to know if it was real.

Those all incidents might have been just him going crazy, couldn't they? His thoughts were a mess. Each one of them started feeling delusional, completely separated from the reality.

Some might say he was getting worked up over nothing, however the raven-haired had a hard time understanding other people. Yet, he himself wouldn't admit it. He'd rather put the truth aside to avoid potential hardships that came with them. The hardships being actually getting help from others. Obviously, this only caused him more problems.

That thinking process formed in his brain early on, while he was in primary school, trying to reduce the amount of issues he had dealt with in order to be independent as much as he could. At least for him no problems equalled independence - he wouldn't have to communicate with poeple to solve them. The need of not relying on anybody stuck to him. Those beliefs reflected on his other parts of daily life, an example being the mentioned situation he created. I mean, if he wasn't sure of Sunghoon's feelings, sharing his worries with someone would give him another perspective on the issue; but no, his younger self would consider it relying on others.

Describing the given situation could feel like a huge exaggeration. For the boy it wasn't, he genuinely struggled - going deeper and deeper into the endless hole when everything could be solved so easily.

With his mind exhausted by overthinking all evening, Heeseung fell asleep - sleeping ever so soundly.
_

The next day started off as usual. Morning routine, walk to school, entering the building, attending classes.

A sound that breaks some students' ears could be heard in the hallways, signalling the end of another class. 

"Hyung, let's go to the cafeteria, I'm hungry," Jungwon stood in front of Heeseung's desk, looking at him while pouting.

"Then go, I'm not gonna buy you food anyway so why do you even need me?" the latter replied, not in the mood for walking anywhere outside those four walls keeping him away from everyone else.

"But, hyung, I don't wanna go alone, you know what people may be there," he argued. "What if someone will do something to me?" he added, ending with a small frown.

"Don't pull out your gay card," Heeseung commented.

"Fuck, right, it doesn't work anymore..."

"What?!" the older panicked at the other's statement. "Ugh, whatever, I'll go, satisfied?" He felt like being tricked into the youngers little trap but it was too late to change it.

Completely changing his facial expression, "Your awesome, hyungie!" Jungwon exclaimed cheerfully.
_

Finally reaching the cafeteria, they scanned the place standing at the entrance.

"Doesn't look that bad to me," Jungwon murmured.

Most of the tables were occupied by either students who wanted to actually consume a meal and hangout with peers or specific groups of people who decided to meet there and discuss whatever they needed to.

"Yeah, come on in."

And so they entered, heading straight towards an empty table.

Settling down, Jungwon interrupted, "Is it okay for you wait a couple of minutes here while I go and purchase something to eat?"

"No problem," Heeseung gave him a reassuring smile.

With that, the younger left, leaving Heeseung on his own at the table.

Not knowing how he was supposed to kill the time while sitting at the empty table; he fixed his posture, his doe eyes travelling around the room.

Heeseung, as expected, witnessed a fight that went on between people of opposite minds which definitely irked everybody near them, some "popular girlies" prating - probably gossiping about some made up ideas, one table being destroyed by a group of vandals just because it's supposedly funny and rebellious.

'Pathetic,' thought Heeseung as he rolled his eyes at the sight.

Yet once again he let his vision find anything worthy of notice. That was when he met a pair of sharp, cold eyes belonging to the person he was recently interested in.

Sunghoon must've been glaring at him for a good while, because the other just then found out the cause of this weird feeling stuck to him almost as soon as the duo walked in.

Stepping close to Heeseung, blocking away the latter's view, Jungwon returned, "I'm back! And look, I even got something for you..." he pulled out a banana milk in a small, cardboard container.

Heeseung blinked twice, failing to get back to reality.

"Hyung? I got you some milk?" Jungwon sat down, closely observing the older.

"No, thanks, I don't need it," he mumbled.

"Fine then, it's mine," Jungwon teased, not bothered by the strange behaviour.

Heeseung's eyes were plastered at one particular direction, he felt as if something made him look there. Sunghoon didn't even look at him back anymore, sitting surrounded by random 'cool guys' at a table far, far away from the older. The white-haired was the only one silent - the others chattered a bunch, being one of the loudest tables there.

Heeseung wished those cold eyes would pierce him through because then he would know if the other really acknowledged him.
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