Dead Boy Walking (Puke)(PercyxLuke)

Round and Round and Round

Annabeth

Percy went after Luke to see what was wrong because he left in a hurry, and Clarisse you know... Something came to her mind.

"What was Luke's last name?" She suggested. I mean, sure, he's from Westport. But we would've known that he has a boyfriend, he would've talked to him.

"Um... His name was Luke Castellan." Tyler answers her question. "He was an only child. Raised by a single mother who he didn't get along with. He stayed with Ram, his boyfriend, more than he stayed at home. His mom didn't care, I guess. Um... He was my age, we went to school together. We found out the same day that Ram was dead and Luke had vanished. They closed the case after ten years. They don't know. Why?"

We all shared this look for a second. When he said his last name, it's just you know... That's our Luke. That's the guy that raised me for a majority of my life.

He had never said a word about a boyfriend, a girlfriend, he never said anything close to that subject. Much less that they were dead. If he even knows that.

Well I suppose he knows now no matter what. Tyler said straight out that he killed himself.

To live with that... That must suck.

"We just, um..." Clarisse wasn't sure what to say.

"The guy that just took off." I explained to him. "The blond one."

"What about him?" That got him excited. "Does he know a Luke?"

"He is a Luke." Thalia told him. "He's the same guy you're talking about. Luke Castellan. He's a runaway."

"That was Luke!?" Tyler was really kind of pumped up now and he seemed kind of happy. "Oh my gods, that means he's alive! I mean, he's not like the correct age, but whatever. I mean... It's him. I didn't think he was the same guy."

"Yeah, I wouldn't have thought it, either." Clarisse agreed. "If you didn't tell us his last name, we would've never put it together. Not right away, at least. He's never mentioned anyone before in that sense. He's yet to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend here."

"Uh, yeah, he was like that." Tyler agreed. "Everyone was shocked when him and Ram started going out in... 8th grade. We were all 14 at the time. Had just turned 14. But Luke had always been very open about his sexuality, about the fact that he had a boyfriend. You know, he was happy."

Percy

It took me ten minutes to find him. He was back by the stream. On the verge of becoming a wreck and just falling apart.

Of course, I hurried over to him. It was like 11:30, mind you. At night. Curfew was in a half hour.

I'm not a dumbass, he needed a hug really fucking bad. And you know what? He cried. He did . For probably 15 minutes. Just let himself go. Which isn't always a bad thing. Sometimes you need to do that just to stay sane. I know where he stands. I had a friend who did the same thing. He was in a depressive episode and he was home along and he slit his throat. He had written a note to me telling me that, even though I'm depressed and suicidal and I hate life, don't do it. Don't become suicidal.

And you know, I have. I've tried to kill myself before. I never got anywhere. But I've tried. Time after time after time and every time it's different but every time I live.

I can't let Luke be like that. Blaming himself for everything. Wanting to kill himself. The desire of death is one that sucks. It does.

He can't go through it. I can't let him do that. I care too much. Sure like I care about others but I really fucking care about Luke and I... He's afraid to date again..And I want to break him of that fear. You shouldn't be afraid to be with somebody. That shouldn't be a legitimate fear. But it is. I mean, I'm not afraid to be with guys. I just have anxiety when it comes to being open about it. To being public with the relationship.

And I'm not a dumbass like a lot of people think, I do notice it. His little looks towards me as if he's shy about it, how he's more open with me rather than Annabeth or Thalia, so on and so forth. I've been careful about noticing things and considering. I brought it straight to Piper. I didn't give a name, but I told her what I noticed and she said yeah, they probably like me. I asked Grover, Thalia, and a few others. I called my mom about it. Her and Paul both said that without a doubt they like me. So you know...

Yeah.

Were in this weird middle zone right now. Where we've passed up just being friends, were more comfortable with each other than that. But we haven't had an official title of boyfriend/boyfriend or anything. And you know, I'd like that title. The last guy I dated, he was really nice. Until I found out that he asked me out on a dare and led me on for like 3 months. He broke my heart on our three month anniversary. That was over this last school year. I went home. He told me that I should just kill myself and I tried to.

That's a shitty feeling. Somebody you think actually cares about you, breaks up with you out of nowhere, tells you they never cared, they never had any interest in you, they hate you, believe you should go kill yourself.

By the time we got to my cabin, it was midnight. Lights were already out in his, so I offered up a place at my cabin. It's not that hard. I'm the only one there right now.

And he just crawled into my bed. There was four to choose from. And he chose mine.

"That's mine, you know." I warned him. I always sleep in my bed. Even if I have to sleep on top of people. I sleep on my bed. "And I don't sleep on the floor."

"Mhm," he responded, looking tired. Already having the blanket draped over his body, his jeans in the hamper, along with his shirt. "It's comfy. And I'm comfortable. So I'm not moving."

"Okay." I agreed to those terms," do you want sweats or anything?"

Luke shook his head.

"Unless you're uncomfortable." Luke told me, which seemed kind of sweet that he considered that I might find it a bit much. "But I usually sleep like this."

"No, it's fine." I promised, throwing my pants in the hamper as I grabbed a pair of black sweats that said AHS vertically on the left leg in blue. Also throwing on a baggy My Chemical Romance sweater because that's all I ever sleep in. I'm secretly a 2005 scene kid. It's okay.

I crawled in next to Luke and turned myself to be facing him. And like I said, he was exhausted.

"You look tired." I remarked and he nodded his head.

"I didn't sleep the best last night." He explained. "The Stolls both had nightmares and woke the entire cabin up probably 3 or four times. But yeah. I'm tired. I'll probably sleep in after breakfast or something. I taught you to smuggle snacks in here, right? If not, I failed you."

I let out a small chuckle. He's cute, what can I say?

"I have stuff in the mini fridge and the cabinet next to it." I confirmed for him. "If I'm up in time I'll grab you something to eat, too. Either way, you'll eat, I promise. But just get some sleep, okay?"

"Okay." He agreed to those terms and he noticed that I almost went to turn over. "Wait."

"Hm?"

And if this is a dream either never wake me up or shoot me if I do, because I'm internally screaming right now. He went from being really careful and sort of obvious to just going with it suddenly. Like he wasn't worried about it. Which he shouldn't be, maybe a little because there's always a little what if, but he wasn't nearly as bad as he was. Then he was kissing me and um... Fuck.

No, we did not fuck. I am a virgin, thank you very much. That was just my mental reaction. But I did return the kiss a bit before he pulled away. Eyes remaining closed as he relaxed more.

"Goodnight."

I just smiled at him. Again, he was so cute like this. And as most people do, he looked younger as he was relaxed and falling asleep. It was a nice sight.

"Goodnight." I returned the half way farewell as I turned over and felt an arm, and I'll give this out.

Luke is the big spoon.