Forced Truth

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I have now realised the pain of seeing your loved one suffer because of you. Recently I have stopped caring.

Karan is de...dead.

He was alive when I last saw him. He died because of me. My father did it.
Isn't it funny how he first took my mother away, and now....he took him away too.

"They didn't even let me see him even once. ONCE! You should have let me see him ONE LAST TIME" I now shout to the empty grey walls of an isolated house.

They sometimes scream at me with a suffocating silence. I remember everything that I did wrong. The news keeps playing the same reports about my husband's death. They were kind, too kind to let me see a picture of him on TV.

He is smiling.

He never smiled when I was around.

It should have been me.

"It should have been me."

Yes, it should have been you. The silent walls reply.

"Why bother living anymore?"

Don't bother. They assured me.

"I deserve this hell."
You do.

"He left me. Like I did before. HE LEFT ME TOO!"
I am pathetic.
A curse.
My black aura takes away the lives of people around me.

"I killed him" I sob into my bent knees as I sit in front of the TV hugging my knees.

Murderer. What a shame. Silence around me speaks.

Having to live without him for twelve days has made me into a zombie. Except I don't eat brains. I don't eat anything. I sit and remember all the misery I brought to Karan. I was forced on him, he didn't even want me to be his wife. He loved Rose, he loved her, he even kissed her but I forced him to be with me. He would have been alive if Rose was the woman by his side.

"Eat this if you want to stay alive" the door of the apartment opens and my father's goon approaches me.

I don't respond. I just sit there conversing with the empty wall. Hugging my knees like they are my life support.
They probably are.

"Should have fucked her when she looked pretty. She looks shit now, don't even want to touch this disgusting piece of meat." The friend of the goon comments.

"Has she even bathed?" Another friend laughingly comments.
They are more than two or three.

I wouldn't know. I don't have the energy to lift my head.

"Just inject the stinky woman with glucose and be don't with it. Why ask her to eat. Bitches like to play hard to get."

And they do what they have been doing. They forcefully pull my arm and inject something. It keeps me alive without food.

"How long do we have to deal with this shit..."

Their voices fade away.

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"Ridhima?"

"Ridhima?"

I crack my eyes open. Even blinking takes a lot of effort these days.

"Who is it?" I call out to the darkness. 
I never respond to the voices, but this voice sounded familiar, more friendly.
"It's me"

I sit up straight as tears well up in my eyes , disbelief coating my face. My body going into shock as goosebumps rise up my arm,  I look at the person standing in front of me.
"Karan..." I all but whisper his name.

Then the sobbing comes. Thankfully he looks okay, his face is as perfect as it was. He is wearing a navy blue suit. He is okay.

Oh thank god!

"Karan" my voice comes out steadier this time.

He is okay.

"You are okay." I voice out my thoughts.

"Of course" he gives me a crooked smile.
I reach out my hand to touch him, but he moves back, not even letting my fingers feel the fabric of his trousers.

His smile starts to morph into a scowl. "Don't touch me!" He snaps at me.

"I just want to hold you. Just once please. Just to feel you. Just to make sure, that you are okay......that you are alive."

He chuckles humorlessly.

"Oh! But I am not."

"What?" Confusion clouds me. Everything around me becomes hazy. My peripheral vision going dark.

"Alive. I am not alive Ridhima." He tells me. "I am dead, because of you." And he tells me some more.  "You killed me, Ridhima"
I cover my ears to block his voice.
But his voice is a constant banging in my head.
"STO-" I yell and open my eyes "-p" my eyes take time to adjust to the dark, that surrounds me.
I jerk away as a hand lands on my shoulder.

"Who is there?" I exclaim. Frantically looking around to locate the body to which the hand belonged.

"Ridhima, it is me. Varun." It takes time for me remember who Varun is. I have only met him once. At the party , Karan threw.

"Let's go. Karan is waiting."

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Thank you for reading.
I am extremely grateful to you all for being such amazing patient readers. Please hang on for a little while. I don't want to make any false promises but hopefully this time I am on track. And updates will be regular. Next chapter is coming sooner than this one did.

P.S. I have not re-read the above text so please ignore the typos.

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