Not the Villain - The Evil Queen's Retelling of Snow White

Two Months and 14 Days Ago

"I know what I have to do, I don't know if I have the strength to do it."

- Kylo Ren, Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Two months and 14 days ago:

Wind billowed in a storm around me as I stood in front of the little wooden hut, scattering my hair, which I had dyed blond for this occasion, and the cute blue dress whipped around my ankles. This time I had enchanted myself to look like a child, because I couldn't use the peasant disguise again. Besides, who would suspect that a child would hurt anyone?

I have to do this. My magic tells me that the darkness in Snow White was growing, and if nothing was done, it would soon take over her, becoming much more powerful in doing so, and chaos would reign in this world. My mirror tells me that livestock in this surrounding area are dying of unknown diseases, crops are devoured by a surge of pests, and at night strange screams sound from the direction of the hut where the seven dwarves live. The dwarves themselves are becoming different, too, apparently. Purchasing weapons for no apparent reason, getting into fights, catching obscure sicknesses. 

I shuddered, remembering the ancient book I read. Once positioned in a person's body, to completely rid a demon from this world, the spell will have to be transferred from an object directly to the person's head or heart. The person's soul will instantly disappear and the demon will be transferred to the otherworld. Otherwise, if the body dies before the demon is transferred, the demon will latch onto the soul and gather power, eventually dealing massive harm to this world.

She would die. I knew that. My heart was screaming for me not to do it, but my head told me it's what I have to do. For a while I had been hesitant, but I decided to listen to my head yesterday because of a new piece of information that mirror told me. 

Someone had gone missing. 

I don't know if it was the demon's doing. I don't know if they're dead. But I know I have the power to prevent deaths from happening.

You promised Casimir you would take care of her. A nasty voice suddenly whispered in my mind. It was your last promise to him. You promised.

But Casimir promised he would always be there for me. He promised he would never leave me. He promised me he would love me, forever and always.

What was a promise? It's just an empty string of words. Words that never held any meaning. Words that could give hope only for it to be crushed and destroyed, a gift only meant to hurt and wound. I know now that promises were made to be broken.

I fingered the jewelled comb in my pocket, took a deep breath and knocked.

"Who is it?" Snow White called cautiously from the inside.

"Good wares for sale!" I used a high, childish voice.

"I can't let you in." She replied, right behind the door. "The last time I bought something, the peasant woman tried to kill me."

"But I'm just a child." I responded, wincing internally. 

She opened the door, peeking out warily. My spirits sank. I had been hoping she would shut me out, leaving me no choice but to abandon my plans. Then I wouldn't have to k... wouldn't have to do it. But I guess that wouldn't happen. Steeling myself, I continued.

"I have a pretty comb," I stated, smiling innocently. "Would you please buy it? I made it myself, and my mommy let me put pretty jewels in it, but I need to sell it because my sister is hungry, she can't stop crying at home."

"I would love to buy it!" She answered, beaming, her distrust deserted. Silently I cursed myself for not teaching her how to act towards strangers when there's someone out there trying to kill her.

Me. I was trying to kill her. No, don't think about that. One step at a time.

I grinned at her, inwardly feeling like slapping myself. "Can I have eight gold pieces?" 

She took some out of her pocket and handed them to me in exchange for the comb. And finally it was time for the last part of my plan. Do it. Do it now! Gritting my teeth, I whimper, "I'll miss my comb. Can I see you use it? Just once? Please?"

She nodded, then released her velvety black hair from her braid. Time slowed, and my eyes widened as I watched her raise the comb to her head. As soon as it touches her, at the moment of contact, she would die. Dead before I could say anything. Dead before she hit the ground. Dead before I could regret what I did.

But I'm regretting it already. I shouldn't have doomed my own daughter, I should have worked harder to find another solution, I should have given her another chance. But it's too late now, isn't it? It's too late to go back. It's too late to change anything.

It's always been too late. From the moment Casimir met Evelyn, it's been too late to change anything, I had been condemned to never find my happily ever after. 

No, it's not too late yet.

Just as I thought that, before I knew what I was doing, I had smacked the comb out of her hand. It hit the floor, shattering, and I could hear the whispers of the magic as it escaped it.

"What are you doing?" She exclaimed. I ignored her, retreating. Then I stiffened, hearing the gory song of the now-corrupt dwarves returning from their mines. I needed to leave. Now. I'll be back for you, my daughter. For the better or the worse. 

I turned and fled.