The Alpha's Sierra

Chapter 11 - Smile

Alexander

Everyone says the deepest parts of ourselves are what we wish to never surface into the light. This part of myself has always felt like a void. An abyss of darkness and space. Always pushing it farther into me. Living in a constant cave of black.

It's where my wolf resides. Where the screams sound, the blood flows, and the sins live. Its own miniature ecosystem that sucks the life out of my soul.

Maybe it's melodramatic to describe it this way. It's certainly morose. But it doesn't change the fact that it exists. Countless times, I've fallen into that pit. My wolf snapping my ankle and dragging me into the void. Sometimes I let him because it's easier. Sometimes, I claw and claw at the edge to stop myself.

Then I saw her. In that tower, singing and dancing. Monty with his arm around her. It was like looking into a perverted mirror of one of my alternate universes. All I could think was...that was supposed to be mine. That life. They looked perfect. The pure joy and happiness on his face. That woman in his arms.

That woman.

The Glaze was nothing compared to the flicker of light that suddenly lit in my abyss. It was soul shattering. And exhilarating. Virtuous. And for once in my life, I felt like I could finally find salvation.

My entire foundation shook below me. I realized that Heaven and Hell exist. But Hell does not have fire, it has ice. And Heaven is red, not white.

My morals are not black and white. They're gray. And I'm selfish. My wolf couldn't be more thrilled that finally, I don't fight him.

Yours. He told me after we watched Sierra run away from under the streetlamp. We will get what's yours, Alexander.

I hadn't slept the two days I didn't see her. My friends tried to talk to me and even by my standards, I had gone radio silent. They had told me to keep a bit of distance and I obliged. The only person I spoke to was Monty. I even called Bianca. Our conversation short and brief.

"I found her." I told my older sister.

Bianca went quiet on the other end of the line. I could picture the look on her face—of indifference. A light scoff, nodding her head. Her response was just as curt, "Okay."

Monty shook his head, "You could at least pretend to sound thrilled, Bee."

"Call me if you need anything." Bianca said before hanging up the phone. It made me smile because that's her way of showing affection. Willingness to help.

I wasn't surprised that Aiden called us in to talk everything over. I was slightly caught off guard when Sierra walked in with Matthew and Sloane. A lamb amongst wolves and yet all I can think of was how she's my deliverance.

In Matthew's office, I could finally see her in natural lighting. Beautiful and angry and so stunning. I couldn't peel my eyes away and I didn't care over the fact that my friends were catching me stare.

They'd flick their eyes at me and all I did was keep mine on Sierra. Her hair a dark, slick black. Almond tanned skin like she's spent the entire summer out in the sun. Short strong legs and a long torso. Her face rounded in a way that makes her look innocent.

Her eyes telling a different story. They're exquisite. They're a dark brown until I see that fire lighting into them. Then they turn into little embers—blazing as if over a hearth. Hues of red and gold lighting around her irises and it's divine to watch.

My eyes skim over her entire body. Even though I tried memorizing every detail under that streetlamp, it's not enough. I don't think it'll ever be enough.