12 || Not That Bad

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Lost - Frank Ocean

𓆩♡𓆪
Alexander

The buzzer sounds above my head like a breath of fresh air.

Skating over to the tunnel I stop before the entrance to give props to all my teammates, not trying to give them a false sense of hope when we get into the locker room.

A 2-1 win over a team we should've beaten 5-0 at the bare minimum is not going to sit well with our coach. And with the verbal beating we all took for fifteen minutes proved that.

Easy to say he wasn't the least bit pleased with our performance and rightfully so. It being our first game as a team together is no excuse for how shitty we played tonight—even if it's preseason.

"You guys better pick up your act or this is going to be a long season." The harsh distaste in his voice isn't ignored and the look he gives me to go with it makes me all the more unsettled.

It's only week one with this team and I've already underestimated the baggage that comes with the appealing title of Captain. I was warned about it from our previous leader, but didn't take it much to heart.

This responsibility is no joke and all the more reason I need to stick to my plan, no bending of the rules I set for myself.

But that's extremely hard to do when the one woman I haven't spoken to for weeks is waiting for me when I walk out of the arena.

"Did I mean absolutely nothing to you?" Cami fires the question at me, her voice gaining the attention of a few bystanders.

"Cami...nice seeing you here." I try to approach her as positively as possible.

"Cut the bullshit Alex and answer my question!" Her voice raises as my eyes stay on her enraged ones. "I get no call back and I can't understand why I was treated like shit that morning!"

"Oh c'mon Cami, you know that's not how I meant for it to go." I tell her sincerely.

"And how exactly did you want it to go, because you certainly haven't changed my mind about anything that happened." She lets out a breath, fuming at my abrupt dismissal of her a few weeks ago.

I pull her to the side so we're not in the middle of the swarm of people heading for the exit. "Listen, Cami, we hooked up," I bring up why she's mad. "More than once over summer, I know that. I get it. But I know the kind of girl you are and what you want."

"And what's that?" Her expression is still narrowed, offended I can assume the type of person she is.

"A relationship." I give her my reason and see her face drop slightly, telling me everything I need to know. "I like you Cami, I do, but–"

"But what Alex?" she stresses. "You can't give me that?"

I shake my head at her. "I can't and you know that."

"Well clearly I don't know a damn thing. I thought you wanted us to be more than whatever we were doing, but you love your sport more than you can try and love anybody else." Cami goes out on a whim and assumes something herself.

"That's not true Cami–"

She interrupts me again. "Save it Alex. Maybe that girl was right, I should just burn your jersey like she did." Is the last thing she spits at me before storming off.

I turn around and watch her disappear into the crowd, becoming just another head in the mob as they walk towards the exit. Blowing out an exhausted breath, I know I'll have to find time to apologize to her soon.

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