Our Journey From Engagement To Marriage (#1) ✔

5. Decision

I want to know you.

What if the person is not judging you but wants to know you and feeling the same emotions which you are feeling right now.

His words echoed in my mind again and again. No one wants to know me because there is nothing interesting in me, then what he saw in me that he wanted to know about me.

I am just an ordinary and simple girl who always wants to keep her thoughts to herself so no one can judge her or mocked her.

I am afraid to let out my thoughts because I know there are many people who are intelligent than her and could have laugh at her stupid thoughts because it happens with her often so she keep her thoughts to herself.

But when he said I want to know you. It felt like, we are not talking about our future, it was like, he really wants to know me, The real me.

He wants to hear my thoughts without judging me or laughing at my thoughts.

Is it possible, a person feel the different warmth from the complete stranger in their very first meet. Because if it is possible, I am feeling the same warmth from him.

In a very first time in my life someone  wants to know me.

"You asked him, what you want to ask..." I came out from my thoughts  when Shivani di asked me.

I was standing in my room's balcony   when di asked me.

I nodded my head slowly while looking outside.

" So how's he?" Shivani di asked me coming to the balcony.

"He is nice and honest too." I said while looking outside at the tree far which is two streets away from our house.

"Do you like him?" She asked me.

'Do i like him..?' I asked myself..

No one make me feel that way. May be because I didn't interact with boys that much in my life. It is not because I don't like them or I afraid of them.

It just that the incident in my school affected me badly.

When I was in twelfth grade I had a huge crush on a boy. He was my classmate and I admired him from afar because I never have a courage to confessed my feelings to him.

Whenever he talked to me, smile never leave from my face whole day.
He was dating my cousin Riki. I know they are not serious about their relationship, just passing time with each other. But I didn't had any problem with that. It's their life and they can do anything.

But one day when one of my closest friend, who knew about my crush, betrayed me and tell everything to Riki.

Riki and her boyfriend create a seen in front of whole class and mocked me, laugh at me, humiliate me.

Later that day after school she told about that to my parents and I got scolding from my whole family and earned a slap from my mother.

After that day I cried whole week and decided, I will never talk to any boy and never make friends.

This also affects me in my college life and office also. Except Kshama I don't  have any friend.

But when I meet Siddharth, he make me feel respected and comfortable. He doesn't care if I failed in government exams and not intelligent like others or him.

He knew, I was nervous and he also didn't hide his nervousness as well. He honestly told me about his previous life, his playboy thing.

Even knowing that it may affect my decision, he told me everything. He didn't hide anything from me.