26: I've Got You

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A good chunk of my life, I've waited for a man to want me

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A good chunk of my life, I've waited for a man to want me., to be sought after and held as if I'm the best thing they've ever snuggled with.

I'm a romantic and I have no shame in admitting it.

Tonight, I'm getting more than I ever imagined.

Last night, I had gone through many stages of fear and emotional distress after Tyler tried vandalizing my flower shop again. But all that is forgotten because tonight, Lee and darling loved ones are giving me something special.

It is my most favorite things in the world.

Being with the ones I love, spending time together under the stars with a bonfire keeping us warm.

Nick throws one more log in, the flames stretching up as if they could touch the stars. The warmth heats up my face, burning it a little bit and it's so comforting as if the fire is embracing me. But not as amazing as being held by the man who has stolen my heart and carries it with his big hands. When I first had met Lee, I thought he was the typical tough guy, but then layers started peeling back and there is so much more depth to him than any other man I know.

Lee's arms are solid, protective and have transported me to a place of serenity and safety where I'm being restored. All that fear and panic can't touch me when he has me cocooned in his strength.

His heartbeat echoes against my back and every beating pulse mends all the brokenness I've faced. That each heartache and horror I've faced was worth it because I'm here, in this amazing man's arms. My love for him is nothing like I've ever experienced before. It's overwhelming, messy in the most beautiful way.

I've always wanted something... perfect.

The perfect guy.

But with Lee I've realized love isn't all rainbows and butterflies. It's hard and it hurts, it's flawed. Even during the happiest times, it can be overwhelmingly painful, but beautifully so.

I'm not perfect, far from it, and neither is Lee, but we're good for each other. Lee has flaws just like me. If anything, perfect shouldn't be what defines love.

No one word should define it. There are so many differing attributes that make up love, so many emotions and hardships.

But I know Lee is it.

I love him and want him with me, by my side.

I know this because... well, realistically, he's going to mess up. There will be times he'll hurt me, lie to me, make me want to punch him. He's human and those things are bound to happen. No relationship doesn't have it obstacles and struggles. But it's how even with all this potential pain and vulnerability, I want to hold onto him and never let go.

Nick jumps back as the fire roars, sitting down next to Shae who is sitting pretty close to Lexi. I smile and snuggle deeper into my man's embrace, turning on my side and nuzzling my face into his chest.

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