Mending Broken Hearts

13. Friends

September 27th, 2019

Omar

The roadmap to getting my life back on track had been the following: 

Spend one year in the Internal Medicine program at the University Hospital of Illinois in Chicago so there are no gaps in my CV while applying for surgery programs - to do what had always been my career goal; become a surgeon at a major academic center. 

By all accounts I was well on my way to that ultimate goal. I had done superbly in residency so far; the attendings gave me great me reviews, the senior residents (including her) said I was one of the best interns they had worked with and my patients and their families always appreciated me taking care of them.  And I had interviews lined up at several leading surgery programs around the country, all outside of Chicago. 

The cherry on top was that my childhood friend had made great strides in her road to recovery from a life-threatening illness and was close to coming off the ventilator. Baby girl Noor had never required a ventilator and was now growing and feeding like a premature champ. Even the annoying Salman was becoming more bearable. 

Yet, I hadn't been able to sleep peacefully a single night over the last two weeks. Or breathe comfortably in the morning, as I stood next to the resident who had pulled the rug from under me. 

Though, I suppose I shouldn't be blaming her. I always knew that she was getting married. Yet, I had been foolish enough to let thoughts of her overshadow my every waking moment till it felt like every road I took would forever be haunted by memories of her. And there was nothing I could do to prevent it. 

Except let the bitter taste of coffee, the shade of her, distract me from the gnawing pain within.  

"Are you making that for your favorite senior resident?", a voice startled me as I stood at the coffee station in the cafeteria. I quickly recognized the former villain of my story. 

"Madi left early today"

"Oh yeah?", he leaned against the counter next to me and smirked, "So she is your favorite?"

I silently cursed myself. Of course I had to take her name in front of Salman. But what I could I do? From the resident who had taught me how to place a central venous line in under 30 seconds and intubate a dying patient in under 15, she had become the favorite part of my life. 

Now she is going to be someone else's favorite, I reminded myself the painful truth in a desperate attempt forget her despite Salman's attempts to the contrary. 

"Or is the answer to every question 'Madi' now? Because she literally lives in your head", he laughed. 

"Stop talking to me", I grumbled and tried to walk away. He just followed close behind, still laughing like a maniac. 

"Man you have it bad for her"

I swung around, "Shut up"

"I will, if you tell her how you feel"

I should have denied everything the man was saying, but those words never came out. Maybe it was his piercing gaze, or just the fact that after holding the truth in for so many days I was bursting at the seems and if anyone understood how agonizing that was, it would be this idiot. 

"I can't, ok? She is having a Nikah tomorrow", I heard myself say against my better judgement.

"What?", he yelped, "When did she move the date up?"

"Two weeks ago"

"So you've had two weeks to convince her not to marry that a****le and you've done nothing?"