[16]

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I'm ready for the funeral, dressed in black and my hair falling on my back as I have my necklace on my neck.

It's been two weeks since I received that box. We waited this long so his friends could fly to Italy and take their goodbyes.

I walk down the stairs with my black sunglasses on keeping an emotionless face.

I can't feel anything.

Once I am at the front door, Enzo catches up with me from behind and puts a hand around my waist as we walk to his car.

He opens the door for me, and I get in, looking straight ahead, thinking of all the ways I will make the Americans pay.

Enzo starts driving the car in silence. He knows I want to be left alone, and he respects that.

When we arrived at the cemetary, people were already gathered, some I knew by the looks some I didn't know at all.

Father couldn't come. He said he has something else to deal with, but he will visit the grave once he is free.

I take my seat on the chair, and Enzo sits beside me as the priest starts talking.

"We are gathered here to say farewell to Alek Lukov and to commit him into the hands of God," Enzo squizzes my hand in comfort, and I squize back lightly to let him know I am okay

"In the Name of God, the merciful Father, we commit the body of Alek Lukov to the peace of the grave.You gave him life. receive him in your peace and give him, through Jesus Christ, a joyful resurrection. Give him, o Lord, your peace and let your eternal light shine upon him, " the priest said.

Everyone murmured 'amen'.

"Evelyn, would you like to say some words?" The priest asked.

"You don't have to if you can't," Enzo whispered.

"I will do it," I say, getting up and going next to the priest.

"I’d like to thank you all sincerely for coming today— My name is Evelyn, and I am Alek's older sister. Life changes, radically, nut memories? They don’t. And for that, I am eternally grateful. Me and my brother never had the best relansionship,  I was often away because of work so we spent little time together but I loved him even though he annoyed the shit out of me," I chuckle at the memories " Before a few weeks of his death me and him got closer because in some way I knew I would never see him again." I take a deep breath " I regret not being the big sister he would have wanted and he might have hate me for it but deep down we cared and loved each other," I catch Enzo's eyes who gives me an encouragement smile " You will be missed, Alek, by all of us and by your dad also even though he couldn't make it today."

I murmur a thank you and get back to my seat as I hear other people talk about my brother.

"I'm proud of you. You did great. " Enzo tells me, making small circles on the back of my hand.

I lean my head on his shoulder as it starts to rain.

After the ceremony, everyone started leaving, telling me their condolences.

Me and Enzo remain the last.

I walk to his grave and get on my knees, running my fingers along his name written on the gravestone.

I take off my necklace and put it in the ground as a last gift.

"I love you брат" I whisper before getting up and walking to the car holding hands with Enzo.

(Brother)

When we get home, I walk into my bedroom, taking a long shower and crying, taking all my emotions out without anyone seeing my grief.

Once I get out of the shower, I put a hoodie on and some shorts and get under the blankets.

I hear a light knock on the door and I imeadiatly know who it is. "Come in," I murmur.

Enzo enters my bedroom, he has changed too.

"How are you feeling?"He asks, sitting at the edge of the bed.

"Like shit," I say truthfully.

"Understandable," He says with a smile, trying to get me to smile, and he does. I crack a little smile.

"Can you stay here?" I ask softly, looking at him."I don't want to be alone."

"Of course, amore," he says, getting under the blankets with me.

I turn to face him and hide my face in his chest, his hand wrapping around my waist and the other playing with my hair.

"It hurts so much," I whisper against his chest.

"I know, amore. I know, but it will go away, " He says.

I close my eyes, feeling safe in his arms.

This is the first time I feel so much pain, and I can't make it stop.

Please make it stop.

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