Confessions of a pagan gal. {the finally of memoirs} ✔️

Atheist bro

When I was visiting my brother I could not talk about my belief system or whatever that I hold dear to my heart because of his atheism he was a hardcore atheist to the point where he had no morals. I don't know what was going on with him but he just didn't believe in anything not even nature he thought I was being satanic when I was just being earth-based and nature-based but anyway he was a atheist he never believed in the Paranormal except for a big fourth that was different for him but that was the case believed in Bigfoot but not for anything else and he didn't believe in anything any thought everything was a cult. Something that offended me to a key. Not every religion is a called not every philosophy is a cult not every Supernatural wonder is a cult so don't even start on me on this. I don't know how many times we had flights about what crystals are I take what I do stuff like that he also didn't believe in he was also an ableist he didn't believe in disabilities. I remember him mentioning many times don't even talk about PTSD and I say well that's what drives my creativity and he said well if you going to be want to be normal what the hell is normal anyways he would say don't talk about it and you might leave it a normal life well that wasn't the case with me I was leading a normal life until he came into the picture so. And he was a very strong atheist as I said he didn't believe in anything to the point of nihilism. He didn't even believe in a boo he didn't believe in a horror movie or anything else for that matter he didn't believe in very much stuff except for hatred and bigotry. You're either a f word or a dyke or something of that matter or something that was horrible and degrading or you were atheist if you weren't atheist you're going to be called a name and yelled at another stuff. He like to call me weak and other things stupid stuff that was pretty R-rated he even tried me to get me to go back to my legal name which was kind of stupid because he said it was a spiritual thing that I had the name Sufi but really it was just the way it was. He was a piece of work.
What he believed in was something I didn't believe in at all instead I we had butted heads most times. And there was a lot of yelling and a lot of stuff that was not fun and it was an unhealthy place for me to be in and it was just terrible. I considered him to be the evil and I will wait every time I was finished his visit so I'd be out of his clutches and out of his hair and he'd be out of my hair kind of thing and then be done with. I didn't believe too much about what he was. A drunk atheist and a pain in my ass. Who didn't really have any morals. Why do I say you didn't have any morals will look up some chapters above and you will find out the reason why. He didn't have morals because he didn't believe in anything and he didn't believe in anything because he didn't have anything to look forward to in life well that's kind of sad but it's not my circus not my monkeys kind of thing so I decided to cut them off before he did something egregious and I really cut them off then and I only talked to one brother now named John and he only the decent one that I deal with he taught me the importance and the hunger of knowledge by teaching me RF safety training which I passed 100% and I was able to go and seek more training abilities and opportunities it was very interesting but that's the only brother I have now the other two are kind of the pants. It was just one good brother the other two just like my father said we're screw-ups that was about it and I'm proud of my brother John he was the one that gave me my secret wood ring because my mom wouldn't be able to afford it because he was in a nursing home at the time so he gave it to me instead and I still wear it to this day that was about 3 years ago this is the third Christmas and he still is on my thumb the secret wood ring and I still wonder how do they make these small little worlds into this big ring it's very interesting and resin art is very interesting and I'd like to try that one day but I don't know how even though I have an IQ of 196 I wouldn't understand resin. I tried to buy resin products and try to buy resin kits and stuff for crafts but it's just above my head I have seen reels on Facebook without and it takes a lot of patience something that I lack so I just don't bother with the resin I buy resin products like the resin jewelry that's it. But it was my brother John that got me interested in crafting because of that secret wood ring. It's my favorite ring on the planet except for my Rune Signet ring. And then there was another ring I liked that was a Goldstone ring that I still wear and an opal ring that I wear. My mother wanted me to have her old post but I ended up getting my own Opals instead. Opals are like a PRN they can help you when needed they help you with your behaviors and your emotions and stuff when needed that's why I always wear my opal my blue fire bowl or whatever blue opal Mexican thing.