UNLIKELY MATCH | HEESEUNG

19 - Play Dirty

HEESEUNG'S POV 

Our date eventually comes to an end and Sena and I sit in my car, both lost in our own thoughts. As much as I want to focus on the road, I can't help but steal glances at her while she's on her phone, probably unaware of the fact that I'm watching her. Her expression is unreadable- No, cross that. There's this sadness and pain plastered on her features but I just can't bring myself to point out what's going on. I know I should say something, offer some kind of comfort, but I'm at a loss for words. And I'm not sure if she wants my comfort or if she even wants me around at all.

Not to mention the fact that I was, indeed, going to kiss her earlier. Fuck the photos and fuck the whole fake fiancée shit. All I could think about at that moment was how much I wanted to feel her lips against mine but when I could clearly see the disappointment cross her face after I revealed the kiss was staged, I knew I had made a mistake.

"About the charity gala," I clear my throat, making her look up from her phone. "I came across our schedule and realized we have to attend one in two days. Do you have an idea of what we wear? I can coordinate with your outfit if you'd like." Her eyes meet mine when I look at her, and fuck me, there's something in her gaze that makes my heart skip a beat. Is it longing? Regret? I can't quite tell. 

"Are you willing to attend the event?" She asks, almost hesitantly, almost as if she's unsure of what my answer will be. Of course, I never attend such events because I hate, hate being around all those people, the fake smiles, the fake conversations, but for Sena's sake, I'd do it. Anything to make her life easier, even if it means stepping out of my comfort zone. 

"I mean, yeah, it's part of the job, right?" I wonder if I should tell her that I'd attend even if it wasn't part of the job, just to spend time with her, but I stop myself. That's too much, too forward. "I'll make sure everything's taken care of. You just take care of yourself and have fun." 

"You won't let me plan anything," She replies softly, her gaze lingering on mine for a moment longer before she looks away, a hint of sadness clouding her features. "It's not that I don't like it, it's just..." Her fingers fiddle with the hem of her shirt, a nervous habit I've noticed before. "It's new." 

My heart clenches at her words. I know that asshole probably doesn't plan things or consider her feelings, and I hate that she's been hurt like this. Seeing that it's new for her to have someone take care of the planning, I realize just how much she's been let down. "If there's anything you need or want to change, just let me know. I just don't want you to stress about the event. Anything you like, Sena, we can do it." I've said too much but for some reason, I can't stop myself. Maybe it's the way her eyes search mine, or the vulnerability in her voice that tugs at something deep within me. All I know is that I want to make things right for her, to show her that she deserves so much more than what she's been given.

"Uhm, there's something we need to talk about." Her gaze meets mine again, and I can see the hesitation in her eyes. "When two people are engaged, aren't they supposed to live together?" 

"Yeah," I reply carefully, unsure where she's going with this. "Do you want to live together?" The thought almost makes me smile. 

"I... I suppose we could make it look like it. You know, so people don't question our engagement," She says, her voice trailing off.

"Yeah, that makes sense," The idea of living together feels strangely right, like the next natural step in our arrangement. But I can't let my eagerness show too much. "It'll definitely sell the whole fake engagement thing. But it's up to you, really, and you're welcome in my place. It's only me, well, Raven and I now, but we'll make room for you."