Part 21: The Cracks

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John lets us know Grayson and Billie are outside so me and the girls thank him before swiftly making our exit.

Grayson is stood next to Billie they're not talking, he's got his arms cross and she's looking at the floor.

When we near them I look to Grayson and say "Before you start, it wasn't my fault and I didn't touch him once"

"That's true" Mia backs me up

"You can tell me all about it tomorrow Y/N. Next time I'm coming out with you. I love you be safe ok?" He says hugging me

"I will love you too. Bye guys" I reply disconnecting from the hug and waving them off as they get in Graysons car

"I've been trying to get ahold of you all night and you ignored me, I thought you'd left me" Billie says panicked

"Can we just go home" I reply. She stares at me disappointingly and doesn't reply but just gets in the car and drives.

About 10 minutes in, we've been sat in silence she's got the radio turned off and she's gripping the steering wheel. She speaks up saying "Tell me what happened"

"I was dancing until that same dickhead shouted my name he said he was going to ruin my career, I was brushing him off. He got mad and pushed me but ran away. Next thing I know he's begging to get into VIP. I said that it was embarrassing and he punched me" I explain

"Is that all?" She questions

"I may have slipped up and told him you were my girlfriend so that's probably going to get leaked" I say

"That doesn't matter Y/N, it's ok" she says calmly.

I honestly expected her to freak out over that, her reaction catches me off guard which affects my reply "Yes because our relationship getting leaked when you're running around with another girl is fantastic timing. How was your little girlfriend tonight anyway"

"She was my friend Y/N, I love you and I'm not going to spend time with her anymore, she was crying over ruining our relationship after Quen relayed what I had told her about the situation if you must know" she says

"I know you didn't cheat Billie but you chose her over me when our relationship was breaking" I retaliate

"I know I've fucked up, you acted like you loved me one moment at my parents and then completely iced me out in the car, so I ran away from my problems" she tries to explain

"And you ran to her" after saying this she sighs, both of us giving up the argument

When we get home, I get out the car and hear her car door open and close as well. Getting into the kitchen I flick the light on and grab some frozen peas from the freezer and walk into the living room, slumping down onto the sofa closing my eyes.

"I'm sorry Y/N, I want to do better for you, for us. I should've chosen you, I will always choose you in the end" she says sitting on the sofa across from me

I open my eyes and lean forward "just like you chose her, I'm choosing me and I need some space" I reply calmly. It's ripping my heart apart to have to be away from her and talk to her like this. But I think spending some time apart will help with moving on and her realising her choices.

"Y/N please. Don't break up with me" she pleads

"Billie stop I'm not breaking up with you, I just need space. If you were sorry the first time you wouldn't have left me tonight. We could've spoken made up and announced our relationship to the world like we planned. You ruined that" I stand up taking the peas off my head and holding my hands out, pulling her up too.

She looks up at me with worry in her eyes "I love you" she says

" I love you too but this is goodbye for now" I say walking her to the door

"Don't say goodbye say see you later" she says with tears streaming down her face. "So I know you'll come back to me"

"I will always choose you Billie, see you later". She gets into her car driving home. I close the door and go into my room throwing my clothes off not caring about pyjamas. I jump into bed and lay staring at the ceiling where I begin to cry and regret asking for space.

__________________________________

A few hours earlier...
Billies POV

"Can you drop me off at Graysons" she says making my heart sink. I've really just fucked up recently. I don't know what is wrong with me but I keep fucking this up.

"Yeah I guess sure" I reply

Dropping her off, I drive over to Quenlins apartment thinking about what I'm going to say to Y/N when I go home to talk to her. As I arrive I make my way up and see the girls sat on the sofa.

"Sorry to call but she was having a massive panic attack it seems better now" Quen says motioning to Odessa. We've been friends for a while now, but ever since she tried to kiss me knowing I'm with Y/N it's been a little weird. I still care about her but I love Y/N and I cannot afford to lose her. I would do the same as her if on of her friends admitted their feelings for her.

I look at Odessa who has dark circles and bloodshot eyes. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry Billie I didn't mean to ruin your relationship. She made you happy and I was selfish. But if it's already not ok with her I'd like another chance" Odessa says nervously

"It's my relationship and my fault, but you shouldn't have kissed me when you knew about her. Out of respect for my relationship I don't think we should hang out. I'm sorry and I hope you're ok" I say to her before wishing Quen luck and going back to my girlfriend to get her back.

Getting back to her house, I open the door with the spare key after she doesn't answer the knocking. If she was at Graysons surely she'd be back by now. I enter the house and she's no where to be seen, I call her again and again but she doesn't answer. I begin texting her too b it she's not replying to that either. Panicking I called Grayson.

"Hey Grayson is Y/N still at yours" I ask

"No her and the girls went out clubbing like 40 minutes ago, why what's up?" He says

"I've been a shit girlfriend and when I got home she wasn't here. I thought she'd just left me" I say  cautiously

"What happened she seemed mad when she got here" he says

" I didn't cheat. I fucked up being too close to one of my friends, then that friend tried to kiss me and when I told Y/N I would stop seeing her she came to my house to talk and I chose her. Then when Y/N iced me out instead of talking to her I ran to help my friend panicking, choosing her again. Don't hate me" I say

"Y/N loves you she couldn't hate you" Grayson says "You've fucked up but Y/N is one of the most understanding people I know, doesn't mean you're off the hook"

"Thank you Grayson I appreciate it"

"No problem" he says before saying goodbye and hanging up.

Hours go by and I get a call from Emma telling me that Y/N got punched by that guy that was at the party and to come quick.
I sped over to the club heart beating out my chest when I arrive.

After arguing in the car and in the living room of her house. I end up leaving with a broken relationship and her asking for space.

I'm going to do anything to get her back.

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