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25 - Unbearable Reality

This chapter was brought to you by: @Jsiehbdjdgshekdubens !!!

A/N: no art for this chapter, as I have been hit by the 24th Chapter Curse (trademark) BUT AT LEAST I'M GONNA FINISH THIS STORY INSTEAD OF CANCELLING IT LIKE THE LAST ONEEEEE! also, after watching the second episode, I am so so so sososososoososos sorry about what I did with Gummigoo. Like bro seriously didn't deserve that. STAN GUMMIGOO

A/N part 2: I really want criticism on my books as improving at writing is my goal, and I want to write stories that everyone can enjoy <3 if you ever see a grammatical error, feel free to comment on it!!!

Recommended Song While Reading This Chapter: The Lobotomy by Maebi

Standing in the now-empty dormitory hallway was a little bit lonely. The only person in this circus that you could spend time with was Zooble, but even though they didn't seem to completely hate you (in fact they may have even had a soft spot for you) you doubted that they'd be interested in you ranting to them about your brain rot nonsense. 

It was quite funny actually. You dreaded social interaction with anyone you weren't 100% comfortable with, but if you were alone it felt as if the world was crumbling down around you. And judging by how unstable this virtual world felt at times, maybe it was. But it was the only reality you'd ever know. 

I mean, at least you weren't trying to spend time with PsychoRabbit of all people. 

PsychoRabbit.

Jax.

Why were you even thinking about him in the first place? Such nonsensical thoughts would only summon despair, and you felt you deserved a day where you didn't have to worry about your anxiety getting in the way. Well, this day had already been ruined. 3 nightmares, as well as being imprisoned, breaking your wrist, etc... I mean, if you could even consider this a day. The sun had been bright and shining the whole time, which is why you called it a day in the first place. In real world time, it most likely would've been around a week? Calculating time was a waste. It would amount to nothing. 

You strolled at a slow pace down the hallway, observing everything there was to see. Well, there wasn't much to see. Just the pictures of all of the people who had died. Died or abstracted. Were you abstracting? Why could you make your hand glitch out? Could everyone that had abstracted in the past do that too? Or were you just special? And if you were special, why? Why you of all people? And did this power also come with the overwhelming trauma that your heart physically couldn't take...?

Your thoughts rambled like you were in a crowded room, filled with chatty people who discussed the normalities of their day. It was draining definitely, but sometimes almost reassuring. It made you feel less alone. Speaking of being alone, where were those pestering voices? Not like you necessarily WANTED to hear them, but the silence of the circus was making your ears ring in a deafening pitch, similar to that of a dog whistle. 

At least you weren't as alone as Jax, rotting away in a prison cell forever.

Jax?

Why would you keep thinking about him? Divert your thoughts already. 

Sometimes you'd hear his final words to you in your dreams. The ones that made his psychosis quite apparent. About how you'd come back for him and keep him company. Talking about how he knew things nobody else knew, including you. But you'd know soon. You'd know soon. You'd know soon. 

But what if you already knew?

His final few words, telling you to remember the room because your abilities were limitless. What abilities?