Artemis (previously The Lady Lockhart)

Chapter Twelve

"MY LADY," PENELOPE SAID, SLIGHTLY QUAKING VOICE BETRAYING HER nervousness as the mistress and servant sat in a carriage on their way into the city, "I do not mean to pry, or to be rude, but do you think—do you think there could exist a possibility that Lord Portsmouth has...another reason for refusing to allow you to marry Captain Jamison?"

    "Why ever might you think that that would be the case?" The maid-in-waiting's worry was for naught, for Emmeline did not appear offended in the least. As she prompted the Penny for an elaboration, sounding interested at something at last for the first time in far too many days, she straightened slightly in her seat.

    "Well, I know nothing for certain, for I have not seen nor heard anything...yet I have been thinking of this—of course I have the utmost trust for His Lordship, but the more I ponder over them the less his assertions seem logical... If you truly were to marry the captain, and he is indeed sent away frequently, what is to stop you from accompanying him on his voyages? Who is to dictate that you shall be a woman always waiting? Surely His Lordship would have considered this – he is highly intelligent, more so than I will ever be; if this solution came to me, he would, doubtlessly, also be able to conceive it. Although it is true that it is uncommon for wives of sailors to accompany their husbands on board, Lord Portsmouth will probably pay existing norms little attention – he is, after all, exceptionally progressive. He does endorse your pursuit of the violoncello."

    Emmeline listened to the explanation intently. While it was unlikely that certain members of the ton would allow her to travel with Captain Jamison without any backlash, Penny made a fair point. Emmett always spoke on the matter as if she had no chance at happiness at all with the captain, and he too had presented valid arguments; but he never seemed to even attempt to come up with solutions for potential problems that might surface. As Bethany had said to Emmeline, on the same subject of her marital affairs—the solution is never to run away from whatever problems you encounter. Rather, with dignity, intelligence, and grace, always face them bravely, and always do your best...

    Emmett had always been an adventurer, and never the kind of man to simply quit something the moment he spied a difficulty resting upon the horizon. He jumped headlong into all his riskiest endeavours, always eager to tackle a challenge. He believed in learning by trial and error – he had made his fair share of mistakes, but he always emerged from each event an improved person. He was not a man who worried about the potential cost of seeking happiness – he was not a man who worried about anything. All his life, he had taught Emmeline by example to greet all that life threw their way with a squared shoulders, a raised chin and a grin. His argument, on retrospect, did not fit the man she knew him to be at all.

    Yet, her absolute adoration of him meant that she never questioned anything he told her. She never paused to wonder if, perhaps, he was not speaking the truth. Everything he spoke to her had immediately been taken for granted to be true as gospel.

    Emmeline could not simply assume that he had been lying. However, she found it inevitable that she began to question – if he had not been truthful to her in providing his reasons against her marrying Peter, why would he have done so? What was his personal stake in her marriage? What concern could he have, if he was not truly worried for her being trapped in a broken marriage the way their mother had been?

    The carriage started to rattle noisily as it came onto a cobbled road, echoing the cacophony in her mind. Emmeline sighed as she felt the beginnings of a headache appear in her temples. Whatever Emmett's objectives were... She could think about them when she returned to Portsmouth. Her trip to London was an escape for her. She would not waste it brooding over the twenty-three year long relationship she was questioning for the first time, and over the brother she had deliberately left behind.