Matenapped

Chapter Twelve.

Chapter Twelve.

Michel

I killed the rogue, and I didn't regret it. He'd threatened Jem, and he'd been a danger to the rest of the pack by trespassing. My only regret was that Jem had to see that side of me.

I got home and quickly changed my clothes before going upstairs, worried that the sight of all the blood would scare Jem.

I came into my room to see her sitting by the window, staring thoughtfully outside.

She didn't look up when I came in, but that was because I was quiet. I purposefully closed the door loudly.

She jumped, startled. When she turned around to look at me, my heart sank.

Her eyes were full of fear.

I swallowed nervously and took a step forward. "Are you okay?"

She smiled, but the action was clearly very strained. Her shoulders were tense, and her posture defensive.

"I'm fine," she said. "Are you okay?" Her eyes raked over my tousled hair, mud covered appearance, and blood-splattered hands.

"I'm fine," I said, slowly making my way towards her. "Are you sure you're fine? You're looking at me like I might hurt you."

She winced. "I know. I know you'd never hurt me. It just...seeing you like that, so violent--" She bit her lip, cutting herself off. "You looked like him," she whispered, her eyes wide and glassy.

I'd never hated myself so much before that moment. If I could go back in time and change how I acted, I would. Anything for her to not look at me like this, like she was a scared little and no was a ferocious pitbull.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, wanting to reach out and hold her, but knowing she'd cringe away if I tried. "When my wolf comes out, often times I can't control it. It's the most violent side of me."

Jem looked dismayed. "So it's always like that?"

"No, of course not!" I said. "Don't you remember when I shifted in the kitchen earlier? I can control it more than 90% of the time. It's only when my mate or my pack is threatened, and my Alpha comes out, that it gets a little..." I hesitated, unsure of the right word.

"Murderous?" Jem supplied, looking sad.

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "I'm sorry you had to see that, but that type of situation almost never happens. If--"

"How many people have you killed?"

I stared at her, stunned. "What?"

Her expression was blank. "How many people have you killed, Michel?"

My eyes narrowed, and I heard my wolf growl deeply. How dare she ask me something like that?

"I haven't killed a single person," I snapped. "I've killed wolves. Murderous, criminal wolves."

"Oh, my bad," she said sarcastically. "So they're not people, then? They don't have lives, job, families, relationships?" When she emphasized the word relationships, she gestured at me and herself.

My teeth were gritted now and my jaw clenched angrily. "Jem, the people I've killed are the worst scum this planet has to offer."

"Caine was scum!" she snapped, her eyes glistening with tears. Her expression looked absolutely broken. "He was vile, disgusting scum, and I still don't think he deserved to die! Just because someone is a bad person doesn't mean you have the right to end their life!"

"Shut up!" I growled, feeling my eyes flash as my wolf threatened to rise to the surface. "Just shut up!"

She was crying now, holding her face in her hands as her shoulders shook with silent tears.

I let her cry for a moment before running a hand wearily over my face and sighing.

"Please don't cry, baby," I whispered, wanting desperately hold her, but knowing she needed her space.

"I just...don't think I can do this," she wept, holding her face in her hands. "It's just all too much. First Caine, now this. Fucking murder and werewolves, and all this...this shit that shouldn't be possible! I just don't understand what the fuck is happening anymore...I just...I don't...I-I can't..." She broke off, sobbing hysterically.

I couldn't hold myself back anymore.

I held her gently, letting her cry until she was exhausted.

"My life is a fucking mess," she whispered into my shoulder. Her voice was hoarse from crying.

I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say.

"They'll find me, you know," she suddenly said, her voice hollow. "The police. They know I killed Caine."

"It was self defense," I said, my voice curt with anger. "They know that."

She nodded, turning slightly in my arms in order to look up at me. "I know, but I ran, Michel. I ran before they could get my statement and now they can charge me. They've been trying to find me for months now. That's why I keep changing cities."

A muscle in my jaw twitched as I clenched and unclenched it. "Jem, please stop talking about people trying to take you away from me. It's really starting to piss me off."

She actually smiled a little. "I'm sorry." Then her eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Wait, who else is trying to take me away?"

Fuck, I thought silently.

I thought she'd figured it out before, but I realized now that I'd just given everything away.

Her eyes widened in realization as it dawned on her.

"That rogue," she whispered, stunned. "He was talking about me when he said he'd take away everything you loved?"

Unintentionally, my arms tightened around her. "No one is taking you away," I said, my voice flat.

"Michel, he said--"

"I said no one is taking you away!" I growled, feeling my wolf struggling furiously within me.

Jem winced. "You're hurting me."

I loosened my grip, barely. My breathing was heavy. "Please, can we talk about something else?"

Jem was quiet for a moment. "Well, I met a lot of people today."

I relaxed slightly. "Yes, you did. How did you like them?"

"The guys were great," she said tentatively. "The women, on the other hand..."

I chuckled. "Lisa can be a bit of a big mouth. She means well."

"I've just never gotten along with girls really well in general," she said honestly, her warm brown eyes looking at me with concern. "I'm not going to have to be, like, best friends with them, am I?"

"No," I laughed. "You're the Luna. It's your job to be friendly to everyone, but you don't have to be best friends with anyone. Not unless you want to."

"Thank god," she sighed.

I kissed her nose. "You're so cute when you worry about stupid things."

She snorted. "It's easier than worrying about rogues and murder, isn't it?"

"It is," I sighed, nuzzling her neck. "I'm sorry you have to worry about those things. If it were up to me, you'd spend your days doing nothing but lazing around in bed with me all day."

She smiled, kissing my chin softly "That sounds nice."

I growled, nipping at her bottom lip. "I agree."

We didn't do much talking after that.

***

A/N:

No, they don't have sex. There's another chapter for that later on. ;)