☆ Rebirth ☆

☆ Chapter 1 : Aster ☆

My name is Aster. 

The beginning of my life was well, exciting even. Being the youngest, I was doted upon by my family. I was happy. 

But after 3 years, everything started to change for the worse. 

And as soon as I can run without falling, I started to learn. Learn to read, learn to write, learn to remember but I was never thought on how to fight. Sadly ,I was never taught on how to counter mean words that is thrown towards me by others. 

'Control my feelings' , 'suppress my greed' , 'conceal my emotions' is never on my mind's dictionary.

Sadness, Happiness, Anger and Resentment, I naturally showed them all, my weaknesses. I was an open book, easy to read, easy to hurt.

Nevertheless, I had hoped that when I show my pitiful side, they will regret their actions, say that they are sorry and everything will go back to normal again.

It was just naive thinking of a 3 year's old girl.

Clearly, that didn't happen. Instead, I was being stared at with disgust, disappointment, and the most overwhelming resentment I have ever seen in my life, from my very own blood family.

I cried. The only person who sooth my weakness at my vulnerable moment is my personal maid.

I had to learn to adapt the hard way. Reality gave me a slap when my family started to deny the meaning of my existence just because of my health.

I was practically thrown out of the main mansion, to live in a wooden house in the middle of the small forest beside it with my personal maid.

I was forbidden from entering the main house unless it was time to eat. A small little girl was denied from seeing her own family, I cried harder.

Even though I tried various ways to make them proud of me. In the end, I can't find anything to be proud of and fell into a minor stage of depression.

I was homeschooled, taught by my very own personal maid. My knowledge is no less than what any other kindergartner learned at their school so, I'm not stupid. That's a relief. At least there's still someone who helped me feel a lot better than I am before.

Finally, I got into a middle school and in the first month, the teachers praised me. They said that I was clever and responsible, diligent and obedient.

For the second time in my life, I was praised because of my behavior. I entered a spelling contest and won first prize! Words can't show how happy I was receiving my first certificate of achievement.

When I got back home, I excitedly showed it to my personal maid and she was proud of me. I then ran out of my little abode hurriedly, I went to the main house, ignoring the panicked voice of my personal maid.

Something I should've never done in the first place.

I entered my father's study room, hurriedly went to him and showed him my first certificate, shoving it onto his hand.

I was expecting a pat on the head or small praise as I closed my eyes waiting for it.

Instead, I heard the sound of something being torn. I looked up only to see him throwing what seems to be my certificate torn in two, into the small dustbin beside the desk.

I slowly went to the dustbin and picked up my now, torn certificate. I was escorted out by the butler and saw my personal maid with a panicked face in front of the stairs.

When she saw my expression, she knew it was too late, the damage has been done.

She hugged me and whispered kind words as I cried a river of silents tears.

*

When I went to school the next day, the teachers were shocked that my eyes have become so dull. There's no more of the bright, happiness shining through them.

But they didn't know my story, and I never told them. Nobody asked.

Nevertheless, with the help of my personal maid, we studied together. And the result is that I got flying colors in each and every exams that I sat on. I entered numerous competitions and got a lot of prize and certificates, I only showed them to my personal maid. I didn't show them to anybody else.

I learned to not do the same thing twice, especially since the thing that I did has only brought nothing but pain to my little heart.

*

A few years have passed.

I painstakingly learned etiquette and manners when I had free time so that I won't embarrass my family's name with my behavior in front of others. In front of strangers. 

Even though in my heart, I know, that there's no point in doing all of this if, in the end, they will not in their slightest, change their opinion of me.

*

I am lucky enough to live in a household that is not short on money.

 The main house is beautiful and where all the family members of the household live.

Well, except me.

I am only required to go to the main house when it is time to eat. Breakfast is excluded though, I only have to go to the main house to eat lunch and dinner.

If I was not related to them by blood, others might think that I am a freeloader. Living in my own building and going to the main house for food.

The fate of a freeloader is not simply easy because there's bound to be a time when the owner of the house starts to see you as a hassle/ another mouth to feed and will give hints to urge you to leave the household.

It seems that my fate is the same as a freeloader.

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