Rivals 🌈 ✔

3 - Experimenting

Raine put out his cigarette and looked to the side. Smoke was curling from Juice's lips. Without knowing why, he kept looking at it for a while. He was relieved the man had gotten his act together again; being stuck with a hyperventilating and panicking guy, would've made this whole situation ten times worse.

"Why is it?" he asked after a while.

He was bored as hell. At least talking would keep him busy – and if Juice didn't plan to answer he was fine with that too.

"Hmm?" Juice gave him a confused look.

"Your panic attacks. You had 'em your whole life?"

He knew his questions were very personal, but deep conversations were more satisfying than mindless chatter. There was nothing wrong with that, at times – but right now he wasn't in the mood for it. The man seemed to have an open mind. Not someone who was wearing his heart on his sleeve, but not the type of guy to keep everything to himself. It felt like he would open up once someone asked the right questions.

"Yeah," he muttered. He had bent his knees and was fidgeting with the shoelace of his boot. "Though I didn't get the diagnosis OCD before I was 14."

So he had an obsessive-compulsive disorder.

The man looked skittishly aside, afraid to be judged. Raine however, was the last person on earth who would judge him. If anything, his honesty commanded his respect.

"It's never causin' you trouble with your brothers?" he wondered. It might be hard to rely on someone who panicked so easily.

Juice shrugged. "Not really. It's more that my thoughts keep racing at night and I start to overthink everything... Or in moments like this. When I've got nothing else to do. But most days – I'm okay."

Raine heard the hesitation in his voice. It felt like he was wondering if that was really true, and whether his brothers wouldn't talk about it behind his back. Again, his insecure eyes shot to the side.

Somehow his insecurity touched him. Wasn't the brotherhood supposed to take away doubts like that? He took Juice for a guy needing a lot of affirmation, who had to be reassured in everything he did. How long was he a member? Prospecting periods were meant to overcome a performance anxiety like that...

"I think it's impressive," he said sincerely. "It requires persistence. Not letting the... fight in your head stop you – not giving up your dreams. Trying to make the best of it. Calls for a lot of willpower."

A pink tinge spread across the guy's cheeks, eliciting a smirk from Raine's lips. Although he estimated him to be in his late twenties, there was something... boyish about him. He wondered how that would show itself in other circumstances, when he felt comfortable and wasn't stuck in an elevator with a guy from another MC. The Mohawk and head tats made him look like a funny guy.

"Thanks," Juice said quietly. He turned a little more towards Raine, his gaze wandering over his face. "How long ago did you patch in? I can't remember seeing you before."

"Six years ago. I was patched into the Santo Padre charter, but when my sister got sick I transferred to Oakland."

Juice nodded slowly. "Sounds tough. Starting all over. I barely know the guys from the other charters."

"Well I grew up in Oakland. Esai's my best friend since... since we were kids. That helped a lot. Was a hang-around when I was younger. But my uncle is with Santo Padre and when they started looking for a prospect, I moved to the South."

He had to admit that he missed it. In Santo Padre he had a lot more responsibilities and he had been close with the guys. Here he could always count on Esai, but since his family took most of his time, he hadn't really found his place within the crew yet. They often gave him the simplest tasks – which was fine for now, but he found it hard to picture his future around here.

"You grew up in Charming?"

Juice shook his head. "On the East Coast, Queens. Left when I was twenty, pissed off the wrong people. Wandered across the country for some time, until I met the Sons. I patched in four years ago."

He sounded proud. Before Raine could ask another question, Juice's phone went off. He had already noticed the man hadn't reached out to anyone; he himself had called his youngest sister a couple of times, to ask if their situation was about to change anytime soon.

"Juicy! Don't tell me you're stuck in that elevator, huh?" a merry voice came through the speaker. The girl talked so loud Raine could effortlessly listen in. "Tutoring was postponed for an hour, thought I could say hi to Chibbies and he told me you never showed up."

"Hey Mouse. Eh yeah – I'm in that elevator. Think we're stuck in here for what, three hours? Gotta piss man. Anyway, I was hoping nobody would find out. Guess I gotta listen to those elevator jokes now for the rest of my life."

A smile spread across his lips and his eyes seemed more vibrant than a few minutes ago. When Juice's eyes shot to the side, Raine turned his head away reflexively; he didn't want to create the impression that he was listening. Although there wasn't much else he could do.

"No way!" the girl called out. "You alone?"

"No – with someone else."

She laughed briefly. "Hot girl?"

Raine had taken the girl for Juice's girl, but he let go of the idea now.

"No. A guy."

"Hot guy then?"

"A super-hot guy," he answered sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "But no dating material for you, Mouse."

"No? You wanna keep him all to yourself?" She started to laugh. "You know, strange things can happen in situations like that, Juicy. There's nothing wrong with experimenting a bit to kill time."

"Fuck off." His eyes shot to Raine. When he raised his eyebrows questioningly, Juice's cheeks flushed. Quickly, he turned down the volume of the device so Raine could no longer hear them. Smirking, he pulled his own phone out of his pocket, swiping the pictures until Juice ended the call.

"So... we're not going to experiment?" he asked with a teasing grin.

The man looked at him with wide eyes. "W-what? You – you'd want that?"

He chuckled softly. He was not homophobic, but it wasn't something that had ever occurred to him. However, the other man's awkwardness was amusing, and teasingly he asked: "Would you want it?"

For a couple seconds the Son stared at him. "No man," he said. "I'm not... I'm not gay."

"Well... you can't be completely sure of that without tryin' some things, huh?" He winked. "We would write history. A Son making out with a Mayan."

The other stared so disconcerted at him he shook his head, grinning. "I'm kiddin' man. You seem like a nice guy, but that goes a bit too far."

Juice took a deep breathe. "Okay, good," he said, his voice a little steadier. "You know – it would be a shame if we lasted this long together and I gotta shoot you, because you can't keep your hands to yourself."

His words made them both chuckle. "Oh yeah – I can already imagine how you're going to explain that to my brothers to prevent a gang war. Sounds like an interesting conversation."

Juice flashed him a grin. "You better not do that to me."

Raine smirked back. "Can't promise anything, baby."