Sisters

•Chapter 11•

A whole week passes and still I have no word of how Wesley is doing. Miss. Lucy was given orders not to reveal anything to me and Daphne has snuck out to see him but when I asked she didn't answer. Since that day she has been giving me the cold shoulder. I don't even get dirty looks anymore, she just pretends I dont exist.

I shut down in a way, I barely eat because I'm so traumatized that everytime I'm in the dining room I hear Wesley's cries. I also dont talk much, if I'm spoken to, I'll speak but other than that, I'm quiet.

"Delilah!"

I move my eyes from the wall and over to Mother who I didnt see walking in, "yes ma'am?"

"I've been standing here calling you. What's the matter with you?"

I blink, "I must have been day dreaming. I'm sorry".

She frowns, "you don't act like yourself anymore is what I mean. My Delilah is never quiet, she's always got something to say and attitude to give. He's doing fine, stop worrying about him".

I swallow and try to keep my tears at bay, this is the first time I've heard of his well being so I'm overwhelmed naturally.

"Get up, you're gonna go outside and get fresh air-"

"Daddy said I'm not allowed outsi-"

"Forget what your father said! I'm the lady of the house, I have a voice too".

It sounds as if she was trying to convince herself it's true but I don't question her either way.

I get up and take my notebook, a pen and ink before making my way outside. I stay far away from the slave quarters and walk down to the river where I sit under the large oak tree.

Flipping open my notebook I write down everything I feel at the moment in a way of coping or expressing myself. Mother gave Daphne and I notebooks when we got our first monthly years back because she thinks every women needs a way to privately say how she feels. I never wrote in mine until today actually. I saw it in my sock drawer and thought I should try it and it would help me.

I finish writing and put my pen down as I read it out loud to catch any spelling errors.

"You don't know how it feels to love you
It's as if I'm falling from Heaven with a broken wing

Each day I thirst for you, to feed on your attention and drink from your laughter until I'm drunk

Loving a man that wont love you back does that to you
It fills you with a sorrow that penetrates to your bones and puts you in the deepest state of lament

I'm a beggar in your presence
A proud one at that

When you smile for her I take the scraps of what she does not soak in
When you tease her with kisses on her neck I imagine replacing her

This jealousy is bad for my health
I wish her dead but I wish her alive
I want to be her but I know only she can satisfy you

My love for you runs so deep I pray every night that she does not fail you like I did
I still want you, dont get me wrong
But the joy she provides you is one I begged God to let me give you

I know that she can never love you the way I love you
But my heart has peace knowing you are happier at the least".

I put my notebook down and stare out at the water. A weird sense of peace washes over me and in a weird way I think I somehow made peace with my feelings for Wesley and his for Daphne.
Its as if...I am letting him go.

"Bravo, that was beautiful".

I close my notebook shut and turn around to face Augustus. He's dressed formally with his hair combed back making his eyes look brighter than usual.

"You mind if I sit besides you?" He asks after I continue staring at him with my mouth open.

"Um...no!"

I move my legs around and tuck my dress underneath them like a proper lady should. God forbid mother knew he had caught a glimpse of my legs when the wind blew by.

"Your a poet".

I smile softly, "heavens no. I couldn't rhyme to save my life-"

"Poetry is not just about rhyming. There's way more to it then that my sweet".

I blush when he calls me that word but keep my eyes set on the River ahead of us.

"Its a play of word, a powerful short story, a beautiful love letter".

I roll my eyes at the last part, "it wasn't a love letter! I was just writing how I felt is all".

"How you felt about a lover indeed".

"What's a lover who doesn't love you back?"

He smiles, "I havent got a clue but I know what a lover who doesn't get love back is".

I tilt my head, "what?"

"A fool. A broken hearted fool".

I don't have the care to be offended, instead I throw my head back and laugh, "clever".

He nods, "I knew that would liven you up. You have the most beautiful smile, why hide it with that hand?"

I pull my hand back and shrug awkwardly, "a women must control her emotions around men".

"Nonsense. Men live to see the joy they bring on a womans face".

I look away from his piercing eyes, "I suppose I'm embarrassed of the gap between my teeth".

"Why so when it's one of your best features?"

I narrow my eyes at him, "Mr. Blair your teasing me".

"I dare not jest my sweet. That gap is barely noticeable, one would have to stare at you longer to see it. And the way your dimples deepen at the slightest movement of your cheeks..."

"I dont know if I'm flattered or unsettled by your vivid description".

He chuckles, "I apologize madam. Forgive me, it's been a while since I've seen such beauty on a woman".

"You liar! The women in french are known to be the prettiest".

"Pretty and promiscuous. French women are to be cautioned with. They are either Nuns, Married or sleeping with every man that gives them a rose".

I smile, "at least they get Rose's. Men over here do nothing but bark orders. They could use a few lessons on romance from French men".

He smiles and pulls out a single red rose from his back pocket. The middle of it is broken because he sat on it but it's fine other than that

"Well your in luck. I happen to carry a rose with me everywhere and give it to women that seem in need of it. And no, I dare not give one to a french girl".

I laugh as I take the rose and give it a sniff, "thank you. I needed this indeed".

"Delilah! Augustus!"

We both jump up and Augustus curses under his breath.

"I forgot I was sent to come look for you because lunch is to be served. We've been gone for twenty minutes. What do you suppose we tell them?"

A/N: Lol that's one of my sad love poems. I'm thinking of making a poetry book so if anyone is interested, stay tunedddd. And hey luv, smile today, as Augustus would say, 'it's one of your best features':)