Hatching

'Nothing Has Changed'

Since that night in LA, Dawa didn't sleep much. And when he did, he always awoke drenched in sweat and out of breath, tears on his pillow a couple hours later. This was precisely why on the way to Mexico City, on the airplane while all of his members and staff were sleeping, he was up reviewing some simple conversational sentences in Spanish.

When they landed, they headed straight to the arena the luggage still in the trunk of the rented van. 

Dawa after using the bathroom had started heading back to the rest of the group when he bumped into a man in his mid 40s.

"Sorry, I wasn't careful." Dawa apologized helping the man back up. 

"It's no problem. I see you know Spanish. You're pretty good." 

"I-Thank you. I'm just starting to learn."

"Ay, here your members were worried about you so they asked me to look for you." The man smiled. Dawa smiled back, thankful for the kindness. Right then, Dawa felt like he could hug the man because the kindness in his eyes were rare jewels. A sight that Dawa only saw with his members and family. Never from strangers.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Back in the hotel, Yoongi and Dawa shared a room. The lights were on since they were both wide awake, each in silence, minding their business. Dawa didn't mind the light because he could see everything and it comforted him to be able to see the room so clearly. The darkness suggested more than blindness. To Dawa, it meant vulnerability. It seemed that all the dangers that Dawa faced ever really attacked in the dark. The car accident, in the night, on the country side, with little streetlights. And Kenzi's attack, at night in the dark hotel room. Yoongi now shared the room with Dawa, and Yoongi almost never slept, which was okay with Dawa because he never wanted to sleep again. 

When he was with Jin, Jin had made Dawa sleep in the same bed as him but Dawa always awoke a couple hours later drenched in sweat and to keep his mind busy, he just draw away on his tablet, in the dark. The tablet light did help and knowing that Jin was there with him did ease his racing heart. But he never went back to sleep. 

With Yoongi, he could have all the lights on in the room. And When he got tired of drawing. He read. He found some apps to help him learn Spanish, so now, he was working hard trying to learn yet, another language. 

~~~~~~~~ 

After successful concerts in Mexico City and Brazil, they were in Chile. Namjoon had been writing away furiously in his notebook throughout the entire trip, whenever he could. Yoongi was always on the computer, playing around with beats and sounds and Hobi had been doing a bit of both. The rapline was busy even during their breaks. The others practicing as much as they could to give their best for their fans. And Dawa too. Except he never rested. 

On the day of the concert in Chile, Dawa had come out of the bathroom. To Jimin and Hobi, he had looked slightly paler. 

"Are you feeling alright?" Hobi asked his voice serious as ever. 

"Yeah. Just a bit tired is all." 

While everyone was busy, Dawa had skillfully avoided his meals. He had a few sips of soda to give him some energy. And he kept up with the dances, the singing and rapping just fine during the hours of practice. A few breaks in between. 

"Dawa, sharpen your moves a bit." Hobi instructed. "And next move slightly earlier than you just did, otherwise you did great." He smiled, proud of the younger. 

"Thanks." Dawa was out of breath. His head was pounding and it was almost time to start getting ready. 

'I did everything fine, I just have to do everything again perfectly later. Hold on a bit longer.' He thought to himself. 

~~~~~~~~~~

It was finally time. Dawa's head was spinning, he was also sweating. But he still smiled when Jimin told him to break a leg. And he was put together when they had their group huddle. And when he got on stage, the lights making his head spin he still managed to pull through. 

He managed to dance without messing anything up. That's all he could think about. His pain was only in the back of his mind, he had pushed it away and made himself believe that the only thing that mattered was giving ARMY a good concert. 

It was getting to the end. He was almost there. And his he missed a few lines in his rap. The song, he forgot a part of the dance and stayed in his position until he remembered and recovered. And when the last note was finished, he collapsed onto Namjoon. The kneeling so, it wouldn't have been noticable if not for the large screens on display. And all of the ARMY saw him lying there on stage. 

"Dawa! Can you get up?" Namjoon shook him. 

"Yes." He mumbled. But his left leg couldn't carry his weight and he again fell. Jungkook put Dawa's arm over his shoulder, helping him stand. 

"Hi everyone. Sorry if I worried you, but I'm okay, just a little tired." The translater translated for him. "I hope you enjoyed today just as much as we did." Dawa panted, he could barely stand and he could feel Jin's arm on his waist, helping keep his balance. 

"Enjoy the fireworks." Dawa slurred and in the backstage his threw up acid and passed out. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

"What the hell was he thinking?" Jin muttered clearly angry. Everyone else didn't know how to feel. After he had passed out, they had taken his temperture and it turned out he had a very high fever of 101 degrees.  "Why the hell didn't he tell us? I mean, we could have postponed the concert if he wanted to perform so badly!" 

"That's why he didn't tell us." Yoongi butted in. "Dawa didn't want to postpone it because it make ARMY upset and he didn't want to tell us because we would of course be worried." 

"And we're not worried now? and how did we miss the fact that he was so sick?" 

Jimin was crying because Taehyung was crying and Jungkook was silent. 'Nothing has changed.' He thought as he watched the scene unfold. Hobi just held Jungkook's hand not because he knew Jungkook was upset but because he needed someone to hold on to at that moment. 

"Guys, let's not fight right now. We're heading back so he can rest and then we'll talk when he's recovered."