Popular Nerd

Chapter Forty Three// You're Right

"I can't feel my face when I'm with you!" Lacy sings at the top of her voice, comparable to the pipes of Ariana Grande turned down ten octaves.

"But I love it!" I finish.

"But I love it!" She echoes, spluttering with laughter as her voice breaks. Dramatically falling onto my bed, Lacy throws her arms into the air and continues to rave to the music blaring out from my speakers.

"Oh I love this song," I announce as the shuffle on Spotify lands on Selena Gomez: Good for you.

"It sounds as if she's farting carrots," Lacy comments as she sits up with a raised eye brow. My lips curve up into an even bigger smile, her laugh contagiously making me giggle.

"Only you would think of that," I muse, joining her on my bed as she flicks her hair out of her face. The glisten in her eye enlightens the mood, her presence a repellent to negativity.

"No, listen," she points towards the speaker on my desk, her thumb controlling the song on my phone, reversing back to the beginning. Through all the laughter it was difficult to listen carefully. "See! Selena Gomez is farting carrots! You know I'm right."

I knew her lyrics were outrageous. I knew that the correct lyrics are 'I'm on my fourteen carat.' However with her radiant laugh and all the positive energy she has brought to make me smile, I went along with what she was saying and nodded with a grin, pleased and gratified that she was with me to cheer me up. The image of Selena Gomez lying down on that green sofa whilst farting carrots was hilarious, giving us- jet another- reason to laugh hysterically.

(Watch the video for Good for you if you didn't understand the reference to the green sofa.)

The song then changes.

At first the music went in through one ear then disappears out of the other. But as the lyrics sink in, with the artist's voice distinctive identity, my face drops with the realisation of what the song is and it's personal connections.

Lacy doesn't detect my abrupt change in mood. With her head swaying to the beat, her eyes scrunched up with a wide grin, she couldn't see the way my cheeks drained pale. I listen closely to the words of the song.

"I know you know that I made those mistakes maybe once or twice. And by once or twice I mean maybe a couple of hundred times..."

These lyrics remind me of one person.

"So let me, oh, let me redeem, oh, redeem, oh, myself tonight. 'Cause I just need one more shot, second chances..."

It was the first time I heard him sing.

"Is it too late now to say sorry? 'Cause I'm missing more than just your body."

If only I knew a way to say sorry...

"Paige?"

"Yeah, I know-oh-oh, that I let you down, is it too late to say I'm sorry now?"

"Paige?"

"What?" I almost jump out of my skin as I see Lacy invading my personal space, her hand vigorously waving in front of my stunned face. "What is it?"

"You zoned out. Are you ok?" Her voice sounds concerned. Muting the song as well as helping me to sit down, Lacy studies my eyes with intricate detail. With a tedious sigh I let my head hang, my fingers interlacing on my lap.

"Just, thinking about him," I admit timidly, shy for the truth at how pathetic my emotions are causing me to act this way. "It's dumb, I know. But when he sang that song, I felt something." I pause. "He can't sing," a smile cracks through my thinned lips. "But every time I hear that song, I can't help but remember what I once felt for him- and what I still do..." I let all the air in my lungs slip out my lips in one long exhausted exhale of air.