Patience & Faith - a journey series #1 | ✔

26: Holding on

"Tapering what little we have."

I moaned in a stinging pain that came from the skin over my abdomen. I groaned because I knew too well why I was feeling it. My stitches I had earned from giving birth still stung deliberately reminding me of my gain and loss.

"What is it?" He asked from his position near the desk typing away on his laptop engrossed in doing his work.

"My stitches hurt." I groaned, laying flat on the bed, the cool air of the air conditioner somehow relaxing me.

He paused and glanced at me sideways. "Do you want to see the doctor or is it just a little?" He questioned seriously.

"It'll pass," I murmured, feeling Zahra stir beside me from her sleep, ready to cry for her food.

"My Habibti's awake!" Musa exclaimed giddily.

I laid on my right side, bringing her closer to my bosom. She flayed her tiny hands in the air, already impatient as I helped her to feed her.

We were in a comfortable, peaceful silence relishing in what Allah had gifted us. It was beautiful and I was more than grateful for the things that had changed. I didn't ponder on the 'whys' and 'hows' because I had gotten everything, I wanted nothing, I wanted my child and husband that's it and in that sweet serene moment, I relaxed and thanked Allah repeatedly knowing it won't be enough.

My eyes unconsciously traced over his large muscular figure, I watched him type away, he was my world, my life, my love. I was blessed with him even though he realized after a year I was still grateful. My staring so heavy his green orbs suddenly snapped towards me, making me gasp and blush a crimson red in embarrassment. My thoughts and emotions are so obvious in my hazel eyes.

"It's rude to stare, dear wife." He smirked suddenly. "I- I wasn't." I stuttered.

He got out of his chair and took three gigantic steps, landing on the bed beside me with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"You were, I know that look." He teased, making me shyer. This was terrible.

"And so what if I was? You're my husband, I can!" I said confidentially.

"Isn't it weird that a girl like you will rake her eyes over me?" He continued, his finger finding a fallen hair as he curled it around his finger.

"What, you want me gazing at another man? If so then I-" he cut me off by slamming his other hand over my mouth, shutting me up, his glare ten folds scarier.

"Don't and I mean don't you dare think of that. And don't even talk about other men, they don't exist!" He growled. I was stunned for a few seconds, then a giggle escaped my throat.

"You're jealous," I stated after moving his hand away.

He was mute and just glared at me, "Oh great, Musa is jealous!" I laughed wholeheartedly.

At this Zahra poked her head out of my breast and stared wide-eyed at both of us, I sat up still laughing.

"Even Zahra smelled your jealousy." I laughed, earning a low growl.

"Don't make me shut you up. So what if I'm jealous, you're my wife!" He spoke annoyingly.

I got out of bed and walked to the dresser pulling my hair in a pony, in all this time my face had changed into a better one. It had the color and life to it.

"Look who's gazing now." I giggled, looking at him through the mirror. "It's called a glaring!" He growled, getting up following me.

I turned around to face him and the smile that graced my lips swiped off as I witnessed the feral look in his eyes. "Musa what's- I'm kidding." I reasoned backing away, feeling the wall hit my back.